satire

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Who's the NEET Now?!

13 May 2020 4 minute read 2 comments Call_Me_Mr_R

Admittedly, in answer to my "provocative" post title, I still am but now I have a lot of kindred souls that have bummed a ride on this crazy train. Some of you might be scared, most of of you are mind-fumblingly bored, and for some places in the worl...

Life advice from a Capybara

29 Apr 2020 1 minute read 0 comments TheCryptokeeper

Today, I've decided to go turbo with my life. If you also want to do this, you can start by betting on yourself with cryptocurrency, sugar baby, and I'm putting my money where my mouth is. OK, I'm going to quit myself for a bit and indulge a bit in s...

Vitalik Buterin: Money Skeleton??

29 Apr 2020 1 minute read 0 comments TheCryptokeeper

Some have speculated Vitalik has a secret superhero identity. They say he is known as The Money Skeleton, the anti-hero of the Bitcoin community. Vitalik has denied these rumors, saying he's a simple businessman and only uses his real name. He has al...

Who are the Bodganoffs???

14 Feb 2020 1 minute read 0 comments TheCryptokeeper

The Bogdanoffs control all cryptocurrency, and more:   They are in contact with aliens   They are rumored to possess psychic-like abilities     They serve as head of secret global financial institutions They Own castles & banks globally   They are...

Enter Eich

12 Feb 2020 1 minute read 1 comment TheCryptokeeper

He's a renegade. His heart is too much of a wildfire for even Mozilla..ayy you guessed it; he's Brendan Eich. "I paid these people to look at me. What are you gonna do about it?"   He's attracting a veritable who's who of Internet criminals. The wu...

Brendan Eich wants your attention

11 Feb 2020 1 minute read 1 comment TheCryptokeeper

Brendan Eich likes to brag about how much attention he is able to buy with his personal collection of Basic Attention Tokens.  "Hi, I'm from the future, you'll wish you held when the apocalypse hits" - Brendan Eich from a future alternate(?) realit...

New from WHARVED: Tour de Force

23 Jan 2020 1 minute read 0 comments Wharved

Of Nice and Men is a snappy, genre-driven play predicated on your typical hero's journey through the heartland once regarded as antiquated--cornball, even--in the pseudo-sophisticated shadow of a cultured society we've been thrust into by the more ma...

Original Poem: Flesh and Blood

22 Jan 2020 1 minute read 0 comments Wharved

Mannequin rest is a sign of weaknessand cheap plastic.My stock at the Sears downtown believes that since they look human,they should receive pay and benefitslike my flesh and blood employees. I'm so tired of emphasizing to these hollow Betties and Be...

Sniffing out Shitcoins -- a Primer in Shit

16 Oct 2019 3 minute read 2 comments Anony

Many of us may have heard our precious alt coins sometimes referred to as shitcoins. Perhaps we were reading a forum or an article, and to our amazement our fine investment was derided with such a term. But how could such a well researched and active...

Don't Piss away your Money -- Invest in Urine!

16 Oct 2019 1 minute read 3 comments Anony

As crypto people we are always looking for the next big thing. The next coin that will provide insane returns like BTC did in the early days. Well, maybe we don't have to look any further, as my research has turned up a unique investment opportunity....