Admittedly, in answer to my "provocative" post title, I still am but now I have a lot of kindred souls that have bummed a ride on this crazy train. Some of you might be scared, most of of you are mind-fumblingly bored, and for some places in the world, it's not ending any time soon. Take it from me, if you don't take hold on this wholly bully by the horns, this coming summer will turn into the mental psychosis of the future. Let's lay down three basic principles that may help you survive the pandemic. Why three principles? Is my attention span capable of going beyond that? Will I ever pay my gambling debts? All good questions but I can't give the reader everything.
NOTE: If you don't know what a neet is, put it in your google machine.
No. 1 - Mix It Up
Days blend into days. Weeks will pass you by with little notice. Without events and activities to mix it up, the days will drag on. You are not that different from a Bengal tiger in a zoo. Your magnificence may different but being cooped in the looped can be the most challenging force that you will tackle but once conquered, everything else will come together.
Going back to the tiger, zoo workers will construct inventive ways to annoy the animals (I mean this in the kindest way so please don't contact me zoo workers). This concept is called enrichment. The tiger's instincts is to toil and strife in the jungle for it's food. It's a brutal world and is greatly contrasted by the "big chunk of meat on schedule" zoo life #zoolife. The concept of enrichment would have us put that slab of meat gift wrapped in twelve layers of brown paper, causing the tiger to engage deeper in its meal and use its nature instincts.
I can't claim to be an expert on human behavior and I'm sure for legal proposes in need to enclose a warning that my advise is probably dangerous. Give me a second, I'll go email my lawyer to verify . . . Okay, I'm back. He advised I stop writing this article at any cost (I couldn't agree more) but my warning is there and so we will go on. The real question is how do we enrich our lives (a./k./a. intensify our annoyance). Some random thoughts in no particular order: duct tape wrap your bags of potato chips, learn to eat with the world's more obscure eating utensils, blackpill yourself on the internet and not in your usual favorite ways, only allow yourself bathroom breaks if you have reached your hourly John Hughes' movie quotes quota, do squat reps while surfing the web, make mini piñatas with your daily medication portions inside, and incorporate elaborate handshakes in every situation (you should be doing this one regardless). For those with spouse/roommates/sonification others - give them a Nerf gun and prompt them to shoot your squat tight buns while you try to eat. Trust me, they will have plenty of motivation after your 500th Weird Science quote.
No. 2 - Mix It Up But Also Find A Routine . . . Sort of?
Contradictions are in everything in life and that's a beautiful thing. At least that's the lie I have to tell myself in order to not cry myself to sleep every night. If you have embraced my first principle of social chaos you'll notice a certain glee but all good things will lose steam over time. One thing in moderation with help pace yourself. Consistency, that poison that could drive you mad but in small doses will magnify mixing it up.
I want you to imagine a dad. Maybe your dad, unless he doesn't fit the narrow definition of my example. Let me paint the mental image from you: a middle aged man with Burt Reynolds mustache, clad in flannel, dead inside, North-Central American English, and can unironically use the phrase "Keep your stick on the ice, bud." His job sucks. No question about it. The ever-changing chaos born of the Hyborian Age would have broken him years before your birth but there was one practice that gave him strength - His routine of coming home after work, popping a drink, crashing in his favorite chair, and numbing his mind with the best sitcoms that the 1980s could provide for a hour or two. This constant ritual saved his mind and you need a ritual or two yourself. Otherwise, chaos will tire you out. Scheduling some routines gives you less to think about in the long run but don't be a soccer mom and micromanage yourself.
It doesn't need to be daily. Try to schedule a ritual or activity that you love to do. Some examples: tea time every day at noon, a particular dinner on Thursdays, a regular gym routine where possible, reading my blog on Publish0x, designated time of the day to listen to your favorite podcast, etc.
No. 3 - Gamble On/Against The World
Do you know how to make your nephew's boring peewee baseball game a million times more interesting, place a big bet on it. Now it has your undivided attention. Every strike will have meaning and the outcome has real-life consequences. How do you do this during quarantine?
There are two ways to look at it. Your investment in cryptocurrency could be seen as betting on the eventual recovery of the world economy or betting against the house (meaning - wanting to see the world burn). Depending on your mindset, you'll see the ups and downs in profoundly different ways. Personally, I have taken a huge interest in BAT and I'm use my BAT to fund my other currency funding.
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That's all I could stomach writing today. In no way should you take any of my advise to heart (again, legally protecting myself) and may fortune smile warmly on us all as COVID-19 continues to delay the shipment of my waifu dakimakura pillow.