Funniest Crypto week Sept. 4

Funniest Crypto week Sept. 4


HEY Y'all crypto people, we love you !!  Bless your hearts on a Sunday - what's our old fever dream - even an atheist owes reverence to evolution.  Or engineering or microbiology, fractals, quasars, quantum physics, something!!!  Thank you for your help here at the mighty mighty poptone Publish0x.  Church lol.  6f2fa8e92ffae61bc73e89acd4569d13ef39fa09743f3f23afd2491dc514d865.pngTaking possession of money by the people for the people of the people, lol.  Bring all that good luck!! Please help!!!

Let's face it, tho all that existentialist whatever.  We are here for the LAUGHS BABY!!  PLENTY OF EM!!! 

Bill Murray raises 200K for charity, gets his wallet raided and loses 200K.  That's funny.  We got all excited as Bill was at an old man bar nearby but apparently Bill was on a tour of ALL of the (not hot) spots,  good on him!  Use created on demand wallets Bill!! 

Always a funny week for lawyer monkey biz!! Bitboy caves on his lawsuit27f4d0c5b09785a9a97253343529c38ae29d5cdf13268a10f3b36790f19804af.png Dear readers know bitboy is -ssho.  

We have never been ripple fans - XRP raised a BILLION in capital, should be miles ahead, what have they developed really ? If Vitalek looks like a typical citizen from 2858, this guy looks like a powertripping neckbeard programming from a lair, lol, sorry.  The Ripple CTO should know from lawyers tho TBF lol!!!  This CTO should have MUCH better things to do, but it IS  funny when Ripple is laughing at your legal troubles. 

Funnier still, BitBoy now gets the Streisand effect - ALL the YouTubers are piling on videos making fun of him.  Plus GoFundMe is against BitBoy.   What a great time to be alive!!  Babs Streisand tried to get out of a book of (beach house) erosion shots, now we ALLLLLL know about it!! Babs was funny in  NYC - she charmed everyone to get into her exclusive co-op, then treated them all like chitHo ho what diva fun.  Then when Babs wanted to sell and move (never there, paying high maintenance $$$)  - the coop refused every single prospective buyer for a decade, lol.  Coop board would not approve any other residents as well rofl!! Thought THAT was the Babs effect!!  Funnier still - our neighbor/friend/bondsman  grew up in her building, he and his pals used to use Bab's elevator lobby / foyer as their party hut clubhouse. 

The king hell horrorshow lawyer monkey biz funny is MUCH more ludicrous than the above monkeyshines.  In actual flying monkey level lawyer evil, we have the powerful Cryptoleaks story (link below): cb05315a206a23326836f8ea15248413bb95601b061bb898392d42697de9a99c.png

In a complete gaming and perversion of the legal system, Roche Freedman lawyers kinda went on tape on their strategy, which is next level Dr. Evil. 

Roche took early & large  ICO action from Avalanche for extra special lawyer powered deviltry. Then started around 25 class action lawsuits against Solana and other AVAX competitors. 

But yet, it's funny.  What's the name of the guy caught on tape!! Wait for it YES!!!! It's KYLE!!  AH ha hah ha ha ha KYLE!!!!! b9dbe210e71b47ecec6ae7d62f0d709cf7a9732227ab287b0cd27c46b87de4e3.pngClass action lawsuits, which only require one monkey to be a plaintiff to start, are protected free speech.  Things you couldn't say in the paper you can pop into the public eye through seemingly more legit litigation.   Here lawyers started a research firm to publish ONE hatchet job report, then used to start the lawsuit. A funny - the bogus research shop was called Arkham Intelligence, lol!!   

Roche acted like a super evil anti-PR firm, tagging rivals with legal FUD and defense fees, plus deliberately attracting the SEC to attack them.

Even THAT banana behavior is peanuts compared to the real prize - discovery.   Roche would like, file a suit that Sol is an unregistered security ( hey lookit SEC!! lookit!! ) and then demand, and RECEIVE, insane internal information from the target.  Here's Kyle b5afdcea52bc77deb7628ae4723968283a41c61d72058b78d10c840cf2805612.pngAnd of course an evil denouement - Kyle is getting yanked off the lawsuits, but the LAWSUITS continue.  Lawsuits against Binance, Tron, Tether, Bitmex, Bitfinex.    Torte reform has eluded the USA for many decades.  Evil monkey lawyers know even if their suit fails, they never have to pay legal costs.   Therefore the attacker's exposure is limited.  Defenders face unlimited possible costs which must be defended as an existentialist threat. Great news for defense lawyers, but  Bitboy shoulda LOST MONEY, NOT JUST FACE??  Should be SOME kind of frivolous suit gas fee in there somewhere...

Plus, if AVAX lawyers get paid a million but cause a million and one in damages to Sol, that's a win!!  If you think sickly enough. Aiee funny, man funny.  Well, if ya zoom out far enough.  Kyle says they just got him intoxicated, that's funny.  Now we think Kyle's on drugs as well as being a real lowlife... and yet..... lol... he's an innovator man, blame the system not the player awwoooooo ohh... that's funny!!!

Funny as Kyle is, our boy Emin Gun is next level.  The evil of his lawsuit calling Sol a security is helping make all chitcoins securities - cmon thats funny.  The Goon and Kyle show sued Craig Wright for claiming to be satoshi - Craig is therefore in breach of contract!!  Hilarity!! Drove down BSV prices is that funny?   Kyle and Gooner made a trophy! a9dba325e907538065d3c043c2513a4af605bf7405f37cc937a2dc702912342c.pngA nice headhunting crosshairs Zodiac killer trophy VERY FUNNY but scary. 

Kyle tags some poor bastard reporter from Turkey with a lawsuit in the Miami airport, the first use of tag law in federal court in ten years.  Goon watches the tape like a snuff flick over and over. 

Goon also claims he's the father of blockchain, has a whole army of twitter bots who say so lol!!  Gun tried to drop a paper from his team as if it was anonymous which is funny. 

The CryptoLeaks article keeps on digging deep for laughs, and gets some big ones!!  Goon always calls himself a Cornell Professor, he's out now but he was an assistant and an associate professor, never a full prof lol!  We feel for ya on that one Gunner, bet Cornell did not properly back Karma, your 2003 crypto miss.  

Here's a beaut - Gun led followers in Simon and Garfunkel singalongs for Avalanche!! No REALLY!! Tweeted right after!! TBF Kyle tells him never to boast about price actions, during rallies,  like he did here.   c1a7149918365dbb9d30cba618a7f27ca720b978c22e6ed363cbbcd2a9d4af81.pngNow THIS is funny.  Why the ($#*$#(*&!!  would you replace the word "darkness" in a pop song with your brand???  WWWWOW now we know, AVAX is darkness. Ya can't make this stuff up. 

 Not THE Darkness, we like them. Don't listen if you are feeling serious.  Or do!! 

Dear readers will remember the Macalinao brothers, Dylan and Ian of Saber.   They are now thrown out from the VC firm they founded, that's funny.  Saber claimed four BILLION locked up on Solana, nearly half of everything.  But the cool part there was Saber's competitors on Solana - Sunny, Quarry, Cashio, Goki and Tribeca (lol.). Turns out they ALL were fake, c16445c2bcfb0952ed161c881a6bdd233132cdff7b9e76017866d566bc648157.png ALL mirrors held up by  Dylan and Ian. Double, triple, quadruple counting, who knows what lying their ass off about volume baby, it's a THING.  THAT's funny!!! 

Waves USDN broke the peg.   Waves sez ya, y'know, adjustments, we are NOT LUNA as USDN hit 90 cents.  Say it again Sasha!!!  it's funny WE ARE NOT LUNA that's the best we got??? lol

 

Celsius lawyers getting paid heavy coin to debate angels dancing.  Some pure custody, pure holding, very few clients will get paid some money sometime, oh but are you a PURE client?  No, you once was doin 55 in the 54,  we hold YOUR funds to pay lawyers.  Funny except for all the skin lost in the game. b36015e0824bf16c5e9fa9d9c8a1c83f95c5c1190261fafdc0de2c8cf14bc4e6.png

Kyle versus Kyle for monkey of the year.  How do we judge them?  Broken arrows Kyle blew billions.  But Kyle Roach may have fouled out the entire industry and destroyed even MORE market cap!!! We'll have to zoom out in time to see this one.  Not tonight tho

Peace

Love

Dave

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Dave Sawyer
Dave Sawyer

National Merit got this punk rocker to Oberlin, and Wall Street fintech gave up world tours and an NYU MBA. I am a Bitcoin true believer. Bitcoin is deeply revolutionary in a way we always prayed tech would be. Keep the baby Faith!


Hi, I am Dave, and I just got hooked on crypto !
Hi, I am Dave, and I just got hooked on crypto !

After decades motorcycling in NYC to work on Fintech and play punk rock, I just woke up to Cryptocurrencies and fell in love like never before! Blogging for the hell of it while learning my way through this awesome, deeply revolutionary evolution in money. Join us while we laugh and flip off the central banks and their currency debasing governments! Stack sats to the Moon, Lambo, don't reck, FUD, FOMO, wild wild west, bless Satoshi!

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