Hey Cryptonauts, mighty Watch Army, we love ya!! Grab the Sam Brownes, flowers n heavy arms, there's a lot of hilarious crypto news we have missed !!
Shane McGowan's dead, we loved him, but he was cooked for a long time! Thought about playing "body of an american" but here were are for reading music TLDL, Davebot is COOKED. Over easy, crispy critter!!!
But but SO MUCH FUNNY CRYPTO NEWS!!!
Warmup funnies - 
TLDR: who even understands this hack. The maybe owner says he transferred BTC and some script did this, what ?? WahoooOOOOO!!! Wild wild west baby wild wiiiiiiild west!
E.g. WTF is going on with Kyberswap ah ha ha ok ok smart contract vulnerability, piff goes 50 milly, more if you count destruction. that's just regular funny. But THEN AH HA HA
TLDR: the hacker abides for six days, says wait until I am fully rested. They start the negotiations - how about 10%. Ok, the hacker says make me the CEO, give me all passwords, give me all the books & records, I will buy out the stakeholders and we will step UP from being a cheezy #7ish exchange ah HA HA HA OMG he is #$@(*$&@#(*$& with them AH HA HA HA !! But what do you do? He might burn it all ah HA HA erm sorry, terrible situation, not funny at all. Moving along folks nothing to see here. OK it is hilarious, hackerprez is gonna fire all the execs and double the salaries of all the tech ah HA HA HA HA HA HA oh no stop they say in any war you can tell who has the moral high ground by who has the best sense of humor ar ar ar ar ar aroooo0000OOOOOOO!!!!! ahh, ya just can't get good help can ya ?? ar ar ar
Hey but that's not all folks, 50 milly, them's rookie numbers gotta get them numbers up.
Let's zoom in on our boy, Justin Sun, well loved by mighty Watch Army regulars for being the king of the chitcoins, world without end amen baby, TRON is STILL a top 12 crypto !! 
TLDR: that said, been a rough month for Justin.
Justin has Huboi, well now HTX whatever, HTX is hacked for 8 milly in September no biggie, then Poloniex was hacked for a 120 million, then Huuuuuboi HTX AGAIN for 115 millon. 
TLDR: Ya know - SING IT !! a hundred milly here and a hundred milly there AFTER A WHILE THAT ADDS UP TO REAL MONEY AH HA HA H AH HA ok sorry
So for Poloniex, Justin ID's the hacker, offered seven days for five milly, seven days passed, Justin raised the offer to TEN milly, Folks think it was Lazarus / north korea. Poloniex says ahhh, don't worry, just petty cash & is restarting ops. Justin is promising airdrops to hold on Poloniex lol !!
ahh better funnier funnies Davebot $(#$&!!!
OK zoom OUT for the BIG funnies !! BTC is at 40K!! Take THAT charlie Munger!! oops sorry too soon!! OK heres a funny. our boys A16Z dropped the best hilarious screed in October, 
here read it read it https://a16z.com/the-techno-optimist-manifesto/. It's bigger than big, here to blast our underwear whiter than white, go Marky A go, ride like the wind!!!
it's ALLLLL gonna be OK boys n girls. !! To Censorship, to Malthusians, to Kramer, we join our (hilarious) boy Elon in saying, in a heartbeat 
TLDR: YAY!!!!!!! BTC versus federal banks everywhere !! Why revolt when it's so easy to subvert!!
On the other hand, of course, we got the nay-sayers, sadly including Vitalek, WTF pony-boy, strap up & ride ya punk 
TLDR: cmon Vitalek, show a little joy ! fifty years ago your life might NOT have been all that, now it is!!
Woah reserves cutting out, gotta snooze, love y'all take care excelsior !!
Peace out, love
Dave
Oh wait wait zoom WAY WAY out for the BIG laughs like always
circle jerks lyrics
I wanna destroy you
I wanna destroy you
I feel it coming on again
Just like it did before
It'll feed your pride with boredom I feel it coming on again, just like it did before
They feed your pride with boredom, and they lead you off to war
The way you treat each other, makes me feel ill
And if you want to fight them, then you're dying to get killed I wanna destroy you
I wanna destroy you A pox upon the media and everything you read
They'll tell you your opinions and they're very good indeed I wanna destroy you
I wanna destroy you And when I have destroyed you, I'll come picking at your bones
You won't have a single atom left to call your own
peace out slieep tight
love
Dave
