Crypto kinfolk, we love you!! Thanks for doing church on the inspirational Publish0x in this great time to be alive!!!
Changing crypto in the FT one click at a TIME baby!! Today in print in the FT !! NOT a dang thing, China's rebellions and whiskey as an investment knock crypto off!! Except, of course, our Oscar winning performance forcing the FT to print btc and eth on a MONDAY THANK YOU PEOPLE!!
Reading music: CHECK:
Crypto that dare not say crypto:
TLDR: HOW could this story not mention inflation? Many local fiats are just not a great idea.
OK online we go! We knew it was coming, dead man walking after Broken Arrows, but it still hurts:
TLDR: everyone had time to prep THIS obit, lol.
It's really funny, looks a lot like FTX took all the good chit BlockFi had and kept it, giving BlockFi some credit and cheap perfume. Which won't fade, unlike the credit line ar ar ar!!! Don't worry flying monkey fans!!! BlockFi has a quarter billion cash on hand to spend on execs to pay lawyers for all time.
Online: regulation a-comin!!
TLDR: We don't understand. Sammy was not regulated in the US, else he really should be in jail. Here a politician says regulate the CEXs. Coinbase already IS regulated like that, what do you MEAN??? Yeah, we know, stealing client's money, re-re-re-re hypothecation, never great ideas. On the upside, Cynthia says leave self-custodial wallets alone!! Like used by early BTC'ers like her.
Rehash using the Howey test on crypto as stocks. Here's that other theme - make sure any crypto regs don't just look like loopholes compared to any existing fintech. That's a catch-22 maybe, a goodish one??
Next!!
TLDR: Inside baseball auditor jokes. And lies, e.g. we didn't DO any crypto audits out of an abundance of caution. BULLLL#($#)*( out of a dearth of credibility and crypto contacts !!!
Prager Metis was a joke, Sammy never even tried to use their name in public, ah ha ha ha ha!!! EY dumped Core when it was clear they were not going to be able to pay the bill.
Rehash It was the biggest failure of control EVER!!! Bull#$(**(. ALL that control bs was just lies, Bernie Maddoff was the biggest failure!!!
It's funny. The old Salomon Bros and Bear Stearns flow charts of corporate shell companies were always good for a laugh, for whatever reason spanning pages and pages with lines JUST LIKE SAMMYS SHELL COMPANIES!!! & then FTX turns around and says we never noticed ten billion in client's deposits going quickly up our arses.
Can the FT come up with ONE MORE crypto dig of COURSE THEY CAN!!
TLDR: Total fraud when up by like 100mm, crypto fraud went up by 50mm. Yay!!! Use cases!!! LOL
that actually includes Terra, rug pulls, Squid Game, and Elon Musk "impersonators", and pump n dump, the lot!! Rehash some UK banks twiddling with crypto access, hey is it FT anti crypto narrative drinking bingo copypasta time??? Rehash number go down, FTX, ... yeah we see it.
Here, this is supposed to be news Starling is not doing crypto !!!
Like anyone gives a rat's furry arse. FU Starling, and FU FT for not mentioning Revolute does crypto alla time and is blowing out nearest competitor Monzo AND Starling PUT TOGETHER in new app uploads!! FU FU FU, FT. We bet MORE criminals get caught with crypto right now.
OK, we love you cryptoteers!!! take care of yourselves. Tomorrows gonna be another day baby!!
Peace out,
Love
Dave
PS please refer a friend: ambassador link: https://www.publish0x.com?a=WZdPKv2bKg
I'm gonna pack up all the pain
I've been a-keepin' in my heart
I'm gonna catch me the fastest train
I'm gonna make me a brand new start
[Chorus]
But that's okay
Tomorrow's gonna be another day
Hey, hey, hey, hey
And I don't care what you say
They tell me there's a lotta fish
Swimmin' in the deep blue sea
I'm gonna catch me a pretty one
And she'll be good to me