FT crypto watch! March 31

FT crypto watch! March 31


Cryptonauts, we love you!! Y'all are the beacon of hope in today's crazy times!!  Thanks for the recent follows, you know who you are!!  We now need SINGLE DIGITS to reach 1,000!! please pretty please?? 

Let's check in with the tradfi gospel, shall we mighty Watch Army!!  Wall Street nukes!! bea5aaa33bf0f0dcc3d0bab04126cfdad6775fb388abe4db9547df7137deb15f.pngWhile BTC prints OVER 28.5K baby!!    50033b58d516eb4cce8f777258b10ce034a8b1790a1153bb4b8c3191dd69718f.pngRead between the lines!!! 

We got yer red hot tradfi corruption funnies!! CZ is getting grilled for letting Chicago hedgies keep trading.  Meanwhile, it's VERY funny, the Swiss accepted ALL of Putin's kleptocracy multimillions, no problem!! bc3cf274570d7875f27b1a7d93f4acee100049a85d6a377d06d3f953e593ad4b.png Including a HILARIOUS fifty million plus deposit from a single cellist!! His due diligence file consisted of a screen shot of a theater in Saint Pete's where he worked sometimes AH HA HA HA HA!!! 

AH yas, yas... this story is really funny.  Accept a multi-polar currency world!! BUT DON'T TALK ABOUT CRYPTO!! NOT a word!! eafe2cc2a5bb91b0cf3139301a521f764253b00110a8d4f30a85f5bdf796e25f.png

It's even FUNNIER.  Ya HAVE to read between the lines, cuz the FT print editors have CENSORED the REST!!!  ah ha ha HA HA HA!! Lookit THIS one!! We bet the original story said "CRYPTO" - they took it out - but they left the PICTURE in ar ar ar aroo0000!!! 

3171a863eff53047783ca8c7e3e9ab3137540a4c99819f51a164784d94300dd2.pngTLDR: seriously!! The real story - hundreds of billions of dollars and Euros are rushing out the door!! Going to - squint hint read  between the lines - somewhere, the FT AIN'T gonna say Crypto if they have a MOUTH FULL!   Here, check the info porn: b60c8f20f37623e1d49fd60f55e24878dc51354caaedbab554dc1c7e1780a0a0.pngTLDR:  1) the value of money stashed in the "safety" of tradfi fixed income is TANKING. 2) Bank inflows have turned into outflows and 3) the high risk, junky AT1's yields are having to go up - but the SWISS GUMMINT just STOLE 20 billion of THOSE, so good luck selling THEM !! 

The REAL story: not of course in the #($*#&$ FT, but crypto inflows are hitting all time record highs.   And those AT1's look pretty poor compared to 12% interest on stablecoins still readily available !! Ah HA HA HA HA!! Don't mention the war ! erm CRYPTO!! 

And, with ALL the crypto news flying around, that's IT for the print readers!!! COLD shoulder!! All the news that fit the narrative has BEEN printed ah HA HA HA HA!!  What about Bernstein saying hyper-bitcoinization will kill all the banks?? A space force major says BTC should be 2A protected!! The second largest stock exchange in Germany just got a license to be a custodian and trade bitcoin for institutions!! AIN'T THAT NEWS??? lawd, lawd AIN'T THAT GOOD FUNNY CRYPTO NEWS!!! 

Well, no, none of that allowed in the sacred salmon pages ar ar ar !!  

Instead, we go online to trudge thru the anti-crypto agitprop roundup of the cryptyfinancially "no news" letter.  #($#!$(&*, we need some MUSIC for THIS gigTLDR: AHHH that's better.  If "Sell Out" comes on next LET IT PLAY!!!

Where are we oh ya the pretend crypto reporting bias showcase!!cdfd16c7226146211d5685ee9865a338393835412494da9fffd1a8018cc36a8b.png

Wait, guess - FTX, stablecoins & reghammering !! How DID you guess!! yer so SMART!  Wow, we thought some of that OTHER fun crypto news might show up!! or in fact ANY crypto "news" this is 100% mailed in retread agitprop from last week or BEFORE!!!

Dear readers know Goldman Sachs pays five billion dollar fines fairly regularly, one recently for bribery, lying about records, and taking five billy from a dictator screwing the people.  Earlier, GS paid five billy (seven billion in today's money) over scr-wing the US people over mortgages!! Does this ever put them out of business?? NAH, they got a 10 billion BAILOUT!! think of it as a percentage of profits the gummint wants their VIG!!! d6d6db81949c6f3a5efeb7cace900773586a79c93c8d9a54f787629442a95ff2.png

Here, somehow the gummint hacked CZ's phone, surely that was legal, and the VERY WORST thing they can find?? Binance asked people to self-certify that they were not Merican!! Whatever.  The FT harrumphs "this one matters!!!'  Yeah, from the same idiots that stated three separate times that BUSD going down would bring down Binance's volume ( QUITE the opposite!! )   As if the fate of ANY single exchange matters in the great crypto / fiat wars of the early 2020's!!  Any uncensored AI will tell ya it's all over for fiat.  And, AI intelligence will beat humans like mammals beat dino's!! Try and stop it, we will watch. 

Anyhoo, every single one of these allegations has already appeared in the FT, yet they call this story a "scoop" cause now they have some emails and chats. e4b28098329854297767de9b1c75b86d95d6b5ded092c194ebeb0d4b8f4137dc.png

While working R&D at a fortune 50 wall street firm, we knew a NUTCASE consultant, who got pissy cuz he thought the CAO was not properly freaking out over the result of his security audit.  So the consultant went through ALL THE EMAILS to, from, or just mentioning the CAO!!  He picked out all the VERY WORST ones and THEN EMAILED THEM TO EVERYONE IN THE COMPANY!! The consultant got fired, the CAO got slowly fired, and many innocents who thought they were bitching in private got fired.   What did we learn?? we expected to find a LOT WORSE if the feds had access to all CZ's stuff, this is all very weak tea. c59a3db8144cb73b01f87fc45abc19eb7db84693449c561a76240c6d6374348c.png

One faintly new complaint is Binance may have been taking the other side of trades.  HA HA HA like Wall Street doesn't do that ALL THE $(*&#$(*#$& TIME!!! Sometimes even INTERNALLY AH HA HA HA HA!!! Wait, was Binance selling order flow like Robin Hood to Citadel!! No, not even.... 

In other copypasta anti-crypto narrative agitprop: FTX, more Binance, FTX, and more Binance. WTF? no really.  Oh, and Circle is tanking. more.  Which dear readers have known for some time. Yawn!! 

 

But that's it for the week!!! we are FREE, FREE we tell you, to find ACTUAL CRYPTO (funny) NEWS!!!

Peace out, 

love, 

Dave 

Follow us on Twitter we promise to follow YOU!! 

Subscribe on davesawyer.substack.com and never miss an issue!! Suitable for framing or wrapping fish!!! 

I don't know what I'm to say
I'll say it anyway
Today's another day to find you
Shine away I'm coming for your love okay
Take on me
Take me on
I'll be gone in a day or two So needless to say at odds and ends
But I'll be stumbling away
Slowly learning that life is okay
Say after me It's so much better to be safe than sorry
Take on me
Take me on
I'll be gone in a day or two Oh, things that you say
Yeah, is it life or just a play
My worries away You're all the things I've got to remember
You shine away
I'll be coming for you anyway Take on me
Take me on
I'll be gone in a day or two
Take me on
I'll be gone in a day or two!! Love, Dave

 

 

 

 

 

How do you rate this article?

30


Dave Sawyer
Dave Sawyer

National Merit got this punk rocker to Oberlin, and Wall Street fintech gave up world tours and an NYU MBA. I am a Bitcoin true believer. Bitcoin is deeply revolutionary in a way we always prayed tech would be. Keep the baby Faith!


FT WATCH - the Financial Times on Crypto!!!
FT WATCH - the Financial Times on Crypto!!!

The WSJ turned into USA today - which leaves the FT at the top of the heap for serious financial news! Join us for a semi-serious monitoring of the FUD & hate the FT now showers on crypto. Dear readers know we love that pink newspaper but boy howdy does the FT despise crypto--- it's funny. The old guard always fights the new guard. The FT does it eruditely, with misleading comments, fun graphs, and outright lies (usually) attributed to crypto's greatest enemies!

Publish0x

Send a $0.01 microtip in crypto to the author, and earn yourself as you read!

20% to author / 80% to me.
We pay the tips from our rewards pool.