Cryptonauts, we love ya!!! Tonight and every night here on the tsunami that is the Pub 0x!!! Changing the crypto fabric of the FT one chitpost and one click at a TIME fams!!!! Reading music for tonight: Trigger alert - it is the Dropkicks.
What do we get in the pink lady??? Crypto that dare not say it's name:
Woo HOOOO!!! & meanwhile, in the US, we have a WAY inverted yield curve signalling bad times coming, and in Tokyo - if interest rates go up to just 3%, Japan has to spend 100% of their GDP on debt service!!! Things are already cracking! Firms making money off the Widowmaker trade, betting against the Yen holding the line!!
The basic BTC premise is alive and well
All the stories we covered online make print today. The only thing that pops is the nasty pic we dug up of Matt wasn't NEARLY as unflattering as the one he chooses himself!!>??!!?
Schmuck. Look at the damage that way of thinking did to London!!! Merry Christmas but we bet y'all won't have one ar ar ar !!!
There is ONE new article in print tho. It's in the category of ok, we knew this was coming, this year, take our lumps ouch
TLDR: Jem's frens have been urging her to do victory dances all year. & ya ok again TBF 
so. what are the real points? First, everybody was WAAYYYY the eff more levered up than anyone knew. OK that's true
Second: this all proves that crypto is NOT decentralized. NOPE, that's $#(#$$#& shit!!! All the CEXs, whales, stablecoins, and group chats can NOT touch decentralized BTC. Dream on, lady.
Third, crypto IS a Ponzi, but it is also circular - all the chitcoins invest in other chitcoins. Well, that's kinda true. But BTC ain't investing in anybody else.
Forth, crypto was fueled by utter lawlessness, FTX did as they pleased, taking client funds!!! Right, and four billion dollars in fines for banks are driven by, total lawfulness?? Any exchange taking client funds is going down just like any regular I-bank.
The FT closes quoting Charles Cardano if crypto will go to zero, as she loves to do. Hoskinson said no, crypto is a religion at this point. The FT closes - crypto is resilient. There is a willing suspension of disbelief - it all still might MOON, you know!! AH ha ha !
The Real story: Crypto is NOT a religion, it is money that can and should be separated from religion and from state!! It's like an ANTI-religion - no one has to believe in the high priests of fiat anymore!!! Still, begrudgingly, hard to lob too many FU's here, and there are some points to absorb in 2022. The utter butthead bros running wild - Alex the Machine doing vids with whassis name Crypto Answers - that was a low point in western civilization we have to agree. Ar ar ar ouuch !!
Online!!! A stinky year for the once heroine Cathy!! 
TLDR: Ark AUM is down from almost seventy billion to under seven billion, ouchie whoa.
Cathie goes 100% honey badger, a ha ha hah ha!!! She is DOUBLING down on Coinbase stock and on Grayscale ( she can't buy crypto directly legally.) It's funny, she's dead game that's for sure!!! Not a lick of quit in her!! Who knows. Here's her current manifesto, bless her
Next online!! This story was around for a while - everybody is ratting out Sammy!! 
TLDR: that makes THREE, as Gary Wang joins in giving testimony. It's funny, Wang did not sign the papers until Sammy was wheels up from the Bahamas!!!
A lotta rehash, one bit WE did not know - Sammy actually WORKED at the center for effective altruism AFTER he left Jane Street Capital.
The REAL story - not in the FT, story is that Gary Gensler will prove that FTT is a security and screw us all with case law while taking Sammy down. Which is funny, in a better world Gary would go down for being SO TIGHT with Sammy!!!
Next online - we knew it but how depressing!! Sammy's part of the in club. Someone not a relative will guarantee a 250MM bail!!! THAT's a bunch of chit, that money belongs to some clients, or at least flying bankruptcy lawyers. Investigate the source of the BOND!!! @#)(!@)($&#*($&#$*(&!!! 
TLDR: WTF, Mom's house is worth a quarter billion?? Booo hisssss. Ah well it was nice while it lasted. Otherwise no new news. Sammy can go see his therapist. How do you FEEL about stealing ten billion, Sammy?? FU FU FU FU FU sorry. That's how WE feel.
But not towards y'all, crypto people. We love you, sorry for losing it there.
Hey we gotta pass out, thanks for being here, it matters!!
Peace out, love, take good care of yourselves,
Dave
PS plz refer a friend, thanking you!!
