Cryptonauts we love you!!  Please refer THREE MORE PALS for the Watch Army to hit 1k!! 

Today's light & lively crypto funnies tour through the FT!

Hey gang wanna see a REAL chitcoin!! 4 billy to zero in less than two years!!

TLDR:  oh wait, that's tradfi launched Virgin Orbit.  Even Justin SUN couldn't get away with THAT one!! 

We got MORE of yer tradfi funnies!! Imagine if Binance  or any other crypto shop was hit with 4.5 billy in withdrawal requests, month after month.  But they only allowed like 13% of those withdrawals to get out!!! OMG the FT would tweak & freak!!  But it's OK when a TRADFI giant locks up like that!! 

ETLDR:  it's really funny, how symbolic is it?? the amount of withdrawals allowed was 666!! 

666 mil!! Why, Blackrock, WHY!!! Make it 667, the neighbor of the beast!  or +1 666, the area code of the beast!! ANYTHING but 666!

Though it was one of the greatest live kareoke songs at Arlene's grocery!!  & so, reading music - dear readers know we like overwrought, silly covers, but no one is sillier than SPINAL TAP!! erm sorry, IRON MAIDEN!!!

Other tradfi funnies - JPMorgan senior staff used to crack jokes about Epstein & young girls WHILE THEY TOOK CARE OF HIS BANKING NEEDS!!TLDR:  the woman who started this suit got fired tout suite!! but the suit seems to live on... 

Hey all the crypto shops fighting with the SEC should TAKE HEART!! They are NOT alone!!

Crypto that says crypto in print!! Well, we get another full page crypto positive ad In another issue with NO crypto news, and therefore no BAD crypto news!! Maybe it WAS an agreement ar ar ar !! 

So online it is!! Whoa, what's that SMELL??  Old rotten copypasta agitprop, a soiled old recycled negative subliminal pic, and some airheaded eurrip writing glossing over key facts with the help of the FT - who could it be?? 

TLDR: this is basically a non story used to repeat the copypasta.  Ready to play?? FTX!, and FTX again!! do a shot!!  Binance has no formal HQ!! stated TWICE!! That's THREE shots!  Rehash CFTC suing Binance, Binance's "hidden" ties to Chy na, Binance getting grilled over offering to buy out Voyager, blah blah blah ECB.  Seven so far!! 

Liz McCaul is driving this load.  We love to  laugh at LIz Warren, screwing actual American Indian kids out of scholarships and jobs, and then trying to raise an "army" against crypto!  But let's laugh at McCaul for a moment.  Here's a funny!! MiCa, the oddly inconsistently capitalized euro reg bundle, is now due to come into effect in 2024, if it is not delayed AGAIN.    McCaul is proud to say the EU is taking the first steps globally to provide for crypto oversight!!  ah HA HA HA HA no they are NOT!!!  That's RIDICULOUS, there are LOADS of regs around the world!! China dwarfs the EU, and they have banned crypto 17 times now!! 

For the REAL funnies from McCaul, we leave the FT and go to her recent blog on this topic.  It opens up with a lie, moves to a HUGE omission or three, and then goes further downhill from there!! 

It's funny, but SAD!!  McCaul once worked in NYC for Goldman and as a reg, we reckon she NEVER EVER EVER took the subways!!   Now her lies have stacked so high she has confused the UK with NYC.   There are NO mind the gap signs in the big apple. Even the rare announcements say "watch the closing doors! "  Mind the gap signs are in London, even Toronto & elsewhere but NOT IN NYC WE WANNA CORRECTION!!! 

Skipping over this lie, which is hard, LIzzie quotes Santayana, "those who cannot remember the past are doomed to repeat it. "  Well what then for those who cannot even remember  CURRENT TRUTHS, like NYC vs London subways!! 

But wait there's MORE!! McCaul pushes the same lie as the FT . She blames the failure of FTX on insufficient regs - funny, the law thinks Sammy broke PLENTY of existing regs!! 

Moving along, McCaul blames the failure of Silvergate, Signature, and First Republic on, three guesses, CRYPTO!! She GLOSSES RIGHT OVER the merger of some Swiss banks!  Doesn't even touch SVB!! ah HA HA HA !! & inexcusably, her blog was THIS WEEK!!! 

AH HA HA HA HA!!  She forgot not just the tubes versus the subways, somehow the biggest bank failure news just SLIPPED HER MIND!!

Silicon Valley Bank, SVB, was the second biggest Merican bank failure EVAH!!!  And 167 year old Credit Suisse CS was one of the 30 most important banks in the WORLD!!!  Why did it fail?? cuz the central banks drove up inflation and then lied and called it transitory!!  It's just the BEST!! Here's our girl back in 2020 spitting the truth! .TLDR: no WONDER she doesn't want to mention the BIG BANKS!! she KNOWS the central banks "ultimately collapsed" them !!! 

Pay no attention to the largest banks to collapse in like forever!! Only beat on CRYPTO, yeah, THAT's the ticket ah HA HA HA HA HA!! 

OK gotta hop, love

Dave