Would you believe that dating is so dangerous it can send you the hospital? It sure can. I’m the living proof of that. ;-)

Mr. Redhaired Young Stud, which I wrote about in my previous blog post didn’t just give me the experience and joy of a first date. Or a lecture of the universe and black holes, as interesting as that is (only not if you are laying naked in a bed).

He gave me Epstein-Barr Virus – also known as mononucleosis.

Oh well, that is not that bad, you say. I had that when I was a teenager. It was bad, but not THAT bad …

Yeah, but that is exactly the case! Normal people get it when they are teenagers. I, on the other hand, got it when I was 46 years old. It is NOT recommendable for older people to get mononucleosis. Just saying.

And because I didn’t feel that I had drama enough in my life, I topped up the mono with a bad case of the flu AND a bladder-infection. I was in a bad condition. Never have I been so sick in my entire life. I went to the doctor several times, and finally as my home was a health hazard and I could see that I scared my daughter, I called the emergency services, and I was hospitalized.

At first, they couldn’t find out what was wrong with me, but then somebody thought to think of mono and they checked for the full package. Mono, Syphilis, Gonorrhea, HIV and hepatitis. That scared the **** out of me even as we did use protection, but luckily everything else came back negative. Only the mono was positive.

It’s not treatable and have to run its course but topped up with flu and the infection, it attacked my immune system, something there made something else blead inside of me, and suddenly I needed blood transfusions. I got totally 8 of them.

At that point my blood percentage was so low that I couldn’t even remember my own name. I didn’t have a care in the world, I was just … weak. So, when I have to go … give me blood loss anytime, it’s a peaceful way to go.

To make matters worse … Apparently, I am a vampire. Who knew?

The first blood that they gave me was room temperature, and that didn’t work for me. My temperature dropped from 40 to 35 within seconds, and right there, I thought I was done with. In al hast they got a blood heater and I remember looking up from my bed and seeing 4 nurses standing with a laminated piece of paper to figure out how the damn thing worked. Can you believe that? Eventually, a nurse from intensive care came and helped them, and I got my warm blood.

But the ordeal wasn’t over. The blood that I got was apparently of some kind special type (probably they had to go out and milk Nosferatu somewhere, and he is of course not that easy to find), so first they shipped some more blood from a nearby bigger hospital and when I was stabilized, I was transferred to that. I was in a ward with all the cancer patients because my immune system was broken.

I remember at some point I woke up and there, right by my bedside, sat the most handsome young doctor and looked at me with a kind smile. Totally a guy I would check out in the street if I saw him.

“Do you know how special you are?” he said, and I just stared at him.
Yeah, sure, just whip out the catheter and we are good to go. Come on, I look like s***!
“Okaaaay. Why is that?” I asked.
“I am going to write an article about you, if that is okay, but I need to hear your background.”
“Sure,” I said. Thinking that the humiliation never would come to an end. “Ask away.”

“Where do you think you got the mononucleosis from?”
“Ehm … I was on a date.”
“A young man?”

I believe, that if you really try, you can probably imagine my bloodless face trying to blush at that point.

“Ehm, yes. How do you know?”
“Because mononucleosis often is seen by younger people.”
“He wasn’t that young,” I jumped to my defense right away. I didn’t want the doctor to believe that I was going through the local schools in my dating.
“Young enough,” he said with a wink and started to explain.

And here is the fun part.

I DID get mononucleosis when I was a teenager back in the 80’s, but it never broke out. Then this virus lies dormant in my body for 31 years. As I had NOT kissed other men, besides my ex-husband who apparently had mono when he was younger, it just laid there. Waiting for just the right moment to screw up everything.

That moment came when I kissed a man with a mutant strain of mono. My 80’s strain detected the 2019 strain and started a war, with my body as the battleground. Which mono who won … I don’t care, I just wanted them to move out!

I nodded … Yes, yes, very interesting, I said, and asked if he could send somebody to change my diaper. I was done with flirting at that point. Basic needs were my top priorities right there.

It took me a couple of months to get over that. I lost 30 pounds, then came corona and I gained 40 (the joy of that). And to top that up, I was also fired from my job which I had for 18 years. Not that bad though, the work environment had become toxic, and it was just the boot I needed to move on, and I took my dismissal-allowance and bought myself a car for my new job, which was located further away.

So … don’t come and tell me that dating isn’t that dangerous, and that part where I said in a previous post; “What is the worst thing that can happen”? Forget it. I am as stupid as it gets and have apparently no clue of what I am saying.

But when all that was over, and I got better, I walked right back into the dating circus again. Now I had the mono, so what could happen? Right? 😉 Don’t worry, no more hospitalizations for my part.

I my boredom during my weakness, I went back to the dating site and began to write with a very handsome man (my age … or … he was just 5 years younger than me, so that’s the same age. Almost. I did learn something. Right??) and he had been a Navy Seal (or a counterpart in the Danish military) and worked in construction now. He was fun and easy going, good at communicating with me and had no problem waiting until I was back on my feet).

Want to hear more about my date with Mr. Navy Seal? I learned a valuable lesson there; I can tell you.

Picture from Myriams-Fotos, Pixabay.