Back when I was a teenager, which is not that long ago, rappers would make money, but not that much money.

They'd be relegation-zone, mid-level EPL player rich, not Man City rich.

I still remember an MTV Cribs video, for example, where G-Unit members were bragging about their new cars, but all the cars in the video cost less than $100,000.

50 Cent once rapped "got a mill' out the deal". Today, rappers don't make $1 million from a record deal, they make $1 million a day maybe.

The way they're resorting to 'side quests' now that the 'main mission' is done is telling.

Rick Ross, for example, is constantly showing off absolutely random stuff on his Instagram, and I kinda love it, in a way.

It's obviously a waste, but it's fun. I wish I had his problems. I wish had so much money I rang up a jeweller and ask him to make a diamond middle finger worth $1 million.

But that's one for tomorrow. Today I'll go back to my non-descriptive, non-branded mineral water and canned tuna.