In the year of our Lord two thousand twenty-one,
When leverage was infinite and the printing was done,
A rogues' gallery gathered on Crypto Twitter's stage,
Each with a promise to defy macro and age.

There was Daniele with his frog nation army,
Bowing to no bank, yielding to no baron or barmy,
"Buy my TIME and my ICE and my spell to be cast!"
While his treasurer turned out to be Sifu (oh, blast).

Sifu, the shadow with a history dark,
A master of pseudonyms, leaving quite a mark,
"Who knew my past?" cried Daniele with a gulp,
As Wonderland crumbled and the faithful did pulp.

Then Su Zhu with his Supercycle grin,
"Number go up" was the mantra he'd spin,
With Kyle by his side at Three Arrows they flew,
Buying every token that the market knew.

"Ethereum is for poor people!" Su Zhu decreed,
From his Bahamas tax haven, quite a bold creed,
But when Luna collapsed and the margin calls rang,
Those arrows broke, and the creditors sang.

Ah, Do Kwon! The stablecoin king of the moon,
With his algorithmic magic that popped far too soon,
"Twenty percent yield!" he proclaimed with a smirk,
While the LUNA foundation did all but the work.

He moved to Singapore, then he moved to Dubai,
Then Interpol noticed and said "Oh my, oh my,"
Now he's in Montenegro, eating prison cuisine,
Still tweeting that Terra was the best ever seen.

Richard Heart, in his hexagonal lair,
Sacrificing billions with nary a care,
"PulseChain is coming!" he cried for three years,
While the sacrificial addresses brought him to tears.

With his watches of diamond and his ego of gold,
He preached self-help gospel to the desperate and bold,
"Hex is not a security!" he'd type in ALL CAPS,
While the SEC sharpened their regulatory traps.

And who could forget BitBoy, the influencer supreme,
Screaming at cameras with his conspiracy theme,
"THIS COIN WILL 100X!" he'd shriek at the lens,
Then dump on his followers from his private Discord dens.

He'd cry on YouTube when the trades went to zero,
Blame everyone else like a tragic De Niro,
From Atlanta's suburbs to the courthouse steps,
Promoting each project that quietly crept.

There was Celsius Alex, the banker of the people,
"Unbank yourself!" was his dangerous steeple,
Until the withdrawals halted and the bankruptcy fell,
Now he's somewhere learning what really is hell.

SBF with his effective altruism,
The curly-haired wonder of crypto's schism,
FTX was the exchange that could never fail,
Until the balance sheet showed it's all fairy tale.

Michael Saylor bought the dip with his MicroStrategy stack,
While laser eyes burned and would never look back,
Cathie Wood saw innovation in coins that now weep,
Her ARK funds descending into valleys so deep.

Charles Hoskinson with his African dreams,
Still promising smart contracts by infinite streams,
"Soon" is the word that Cardano knows best,
While Ethereum users just get on with the rest.

Vitalik sold the top like a wizard so wise,
Then donated to charity, winning the prize,
For being the only one who seemed to understand,
That maybe, just maybe, this was getting out of hand.

So here's to the heroes of twenty-one's bull,
The degens, the builders, the beautiful fool,
Who promised us riches beyond our wildest dreams,
Then scattered like cockroaches when busted their seams.

They live in Dubai now, or perhaps on the run,
Some in prison, some bankrupt, their empires undone,
But mark my words, anon, they'll be back for round two,
With new names, new tokens, and a fresh point of view.

For crypto never sleeps, and neither do they,
The main characters always return for the play,
So keep your seed phrases and your hardware wallets tight,
And remember: if it's on Twitter, it probably ain't right.