Cypherpunks we love you!! & the unknowable Pub0x!! Let's do the tradfi crypto news review with love & happiness like we should!
Reading music: time for an MJ tribute just because!!
Annie are ye OK? What's UP in the salmon lady???
Fiat war machine funnies - multiple articles about how thw west needs to make much more ammo!! Pics of the poor teenagers from the Ukraine training in the UK before going home to die in a proxy war led by the defense industry! Tradfi corruption headlines - the missing nickel is now up to 600 million!! Did high gas prices from the central bank inflation (and the central bank war) hurt this winter??? The big energy company in the UK made 3 billion in profits- an all time high!! But we are moving on happy cause BTC printed just below 25K on the salmon front page!!!
Crypto that says crypto - should be PLENTY right? The FT LOVED it, printed ALL KINDS of articles & graphs when BTC & COIN went down. Now BTC is over 25k, crypto market cap about to hit 1.2 trillion, that's news right?? 
Well, not to the #$(#& FT of course. In print, we get yesteday's bias about BUSD going down. Without mentioning USDT going up and USDC hilariously going down. Seems even more biased today!! That's IT for the print readers!! oh, one article mentions the crypto bust ( when was that? ) and another talks about all the happy lawyers & consultants looking for crypto bankruptcy work!! Really, FT??? THAT's all the crypto news fit to print??
Online, we get some action!! Mostly marsha FTX marsha MARSHA FTX!!
Member Gary blustering about the biggest bail bond ever?? THAT was a lie, Rob Durst ( who died a free man) had his bail set at a billion. Mike Milliken had bail set at 250 million back in the late 80's, that's 633 million in today's money!! Quit lying Gary!!
TLDR: Sammy's flying monkey lawyers say ya can't prove it was him what stole the 200 million the MINUTE he hit Mom's basement. And it wasn't witness tampering when he used a VPN to contact oh, all the other defendants copping deals, and the new CLO. Oh, but Sammy needs the interweb to prep for the trial!! He's "literally on trial for his life!!!" No, he's not. & if you steal a car, don't expect internet access in jail to prep for YOUR trial!!
TLDR: The REAL story: Binance IS going forward with the offer for Voyager. That headline is a LIE, CZ said they would pull back on SOME bids on bankrupt US companies. What a difference a word makes!!! We WANNA CORRECTION!!
Only 0.01% of Binance customers use the US dollar ANYWAY.
Rinse and repeat copypasta - Binance US used the same lobbyists as Binance not US!!! Binance was scrutinized by regs before, including the Dutch !! Binance stopped US dollar transfers without giving a reason!! Whoop di do, Binance is #1 in the Netherlands RIGHT NOW, and just not true. Cue comments from unnamed lobbyists and flying monkey lawyers. Whatever, get some fresh copypasta spin, wouldja huh?? this just makes us feel bad for y'all FT!!
Gary is suing - not actually prosecuting - D'oh!!
TLDR: why not. Part of the Gary image rehab show. Never before has the head of the SEC held multiple private meetings with a CEO who went down in a ten billion dollar theft the next month!! Gary's gotta do SOMETHING to wag the dog!! Not much new news, the SEC notes that someone grabbed 100mm of Terra money into a wallet that has now cashed out with the Swiss. In a fine, centuries old criminal tradition!!!
The double standards as always are hilarious. The FT LOVES to print that Bizlato did some biz on Binance (who didn't???) But they WON'T print the name of the Korean mobile payments firm that D'oh said used Luna for settlements. Boy howdy is your bias showing, FT!!!
NOT in the FT - but in the public lawsuit - the firm is named Chai. Also not in the FT - but funny - the South Korean police went to Serbia this month to try and nab D'oh!!! No such luck tho.
TGIF!! but that means it's time for the awkwardly named cryptofinance newsletter slog!! We are still happy - dear readers know our beer money we publicly put in ICP is riding HIGH baby!! But we still need MORE reading music for walking point here. PURE Jackson 5 this time. A MEDLEY even!! TLDR: feel good Motown!! OK we ride!!
Let's return to those dark depressing agitprop pictures, shall we?? No, us neither. But tough luck, it's the FT ar ar ar 
TLDR: black background, depressing deliberate trail off & down to the right suicide note style subliminals LIKE ALWAYS (yawn.) Same ol copypasta spin spin spin anti-crypto narrative agitprop. Custody had NOTHING to do with ( acting outside of all US regulations anyway) Sammy's FTX crimes. But Gary's gotta rehab his image somehow!! Of course, Coinbase is a big winner as they ARE custodians.
It's funny, the FT printed LOADS of graphs when COIN went down. But they won't print THIS will they!!! 
yep, COIN up 100% YTD!!! & THAT's all that matters. Not to the FT, they manage to find Chris at DA Davidson to say Coinbase is not immune to regulation. No chit Chris, did they, or anyone, say they were?? Chris just downgraded COIN and upgraded RIOT. Well, time will tell.
Other items, with the ever present negative focus, include (as Sugarfix told us) the Leeds police grabbing Bitcoin ATMs. Alex the machine sold 50 mm of CEL privately in violation of Celsius trading policy. The 250 mm ( NOT the largest ever) bail of Sammy rehash. Blender has relaunched as Sinbad.
Next, the FT repeats their lie that all crypto technology carries a value judgement on privacy, financial inclusion, government over-reach. Wow, someone has a guilty conscience!! ar ar ar ar oo000OOOOOO!!! No, but every biased bit of spin from the FT against crypto DOES!! & on the wrong side too!! ah ha ha HA HA HA HA HA!!! 
To bolster this, the FT quotes Lee Reiners, a late to the party prof who used to get clicks by being an ESG religious fanatic!!! & now getting clicks from bashing crypto.
Lee Reiners is an unmitigated blow hard, check his old twitter feed. He says he would vote for a pol who wants to change the name of crypto to creepy dough. He kisses Molly White's butt for denigrating all Web3. Even in 2022, Lee says blockchain and crypto provide no value (tell that to the Turks & Vietnamese & Nigerians & Egyptians you rich first world elitist out of touch no empathy snob!!!!) Lee literally blames crypto for killing babies !!! (conflating it with ransomware, which has been running since the 1980s).
When anyone says we have to get ready for defi, Lee says "no we don't." This jerk says when Coinbase & others asked for regulatory clarity, they really said the rules should not apply to them. Eat a whole bag of FU's, Lee !! 
In today's lie, Lee says that the argument that over regulating crypto innovation will just drive it offshore is a "self-serving line spun by crypto boosters" that "implies that innovation is an unmitigated good. " NO it freaking does NOT, you pinhead. Cars kill more Americans every year than, well, anything. Does allowing cars to be built, with safety regs, in America, imply that they are an unmitigated good??
Of course it does not! Hence the safety regs!!
Finally, thankfully, we close with the FT's attempt at a scary graph, as part of a rehash of the bash on BUSD. 
TLDR: CZ says BUSD never made much money for Binance. But the FT sez oh lookie, BUSD was a 40% of all Binance's trading volume!! Oh, that sounds like big biz!!
Only to a moron, or a liar.
The wife says we forgive abusive -rseholes far too much, and indeed our first impulse is to say the FT is just ignorant here. They never trade ANY crypto, they don't UNDERSTAND that of course your have to wash a trading pair thru a stablecoin in order to get to anything interesting!!! Try trading directly out of #332 SuperRare (going down) into #331 Dopex (going up!) The pair just doesn't exist ANYWHERE!! And for good reason, the spread would be wide enough to drive the FT's ego thru!!
In reality, even a casual and disinterested observer knows all that by heart by now. That smug, self satisfied looks "pretty big to me" is just playing to the back row of ignorant, fearful crypto haters cheering against the revolution!! 
OK cryptonauts, we are all caught up with the tradfi agitprop!! We loved having a laugh and a song with y'all, hope ye did too!! Take great care of yourselves, it is CRUCIAL!!! Keep on keeping on opening the crypto positive Overton window!!!! The unbanked, crying out for privacy, suffering from government over-reach are COUNTING on us all!!
Peace out,
love,
Dave
Thanks for the referrals, please, find a few more, WE are counting on y'all!! ambassador link: https://www.publish0x.com?a=WZdPKv2bKg
Oh, baby, give me one more chance (to show you that I love you)
Won't you please let me back in your heart
Oh, darlin', I was blind to let you go (let you go, baby)
But now since I see you in his arms (I want you back)
Yes, I do now (I want you back)
Ooh, ooh, baby (I want you back)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (I want you back)
Na, na, na, na
Trying to live without your love is one long sleepless night
Let me show you, girl, that I know wrong from right
Every street you walk on, I leave tear stains on the ground
Following the girl I didn't even want around
Let me tell you now
love
Dave
