In response to overwhelming digital and real world FUD, the XRP army stormed the United States White House dressed in their daughters' Halloween costumes demanding that President Donald Trump be reinstated and Ripple CEO Brad Garlinghouse pardoned from all crimes.
The United States apparently viewed these drunk autistic imbeciles as less of a threat than the peaceful Black Lives Matter protests months earlier. Instead of responding to the disruption with armed soldiers, tear gas, rubber bullets, dogs, billy clubs, sound weapons and riot gear, the entire official body of the United States tucked tail and ran like a bunch of spanked bitches.
Among other chicanery, the official podium of the United States House of Representatives ended up on eBay with a price tag of $80,000.
"All we want is justice and money," one toothless, unbelievably hairy participant informed media. "The deep state stole the election from Donald Trump and the value out of XRP. Brad Garlinghouse was my only way to pay rent next month, and you took that from me. It's time to go 100% apeshit Viking and show you what America is all about." Attempts to query other participants were met with various grunts, growls and mumbled invocations to Alex Jones.
Bitcoin and ether laughed in the face of this nonsense, with BTC going to all time highs. The entire crypto market broke $1 trillion worth of market value for the first time ever as well.
"We really don't respond in the same way as stocks do to uncertainly," Bitcoin informed us. "But this really isn't even uncertainty. It's quite certain that anyone who likes Donald Trump and Brad Garlinghouse is going to act like an idiot. The market already had this priced in."
It remains to be seen when the United States will regain control of its shit. Details at 11.
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Burgerswap Bridge will steal your crypto
Deus.Finance is led by a psychotic wannabe despot
AllianceBlock is a shit project
All algorithmic stablecoins (Basis Cash, Mithril, Empty Set Dollar) are a SCAM
Don’t get your bitcoin from PayPal
Trade on BSC, not Ethereum
Ivan on Tech, Elliotrades and Bitboy are complete liars, and
If you are always losing money trading crypto, read here.
