Being new around these parts, but having done a lot of research, I'm still left with some things that don't quite make sense.

First, S--tcoins. Apparently all 3lit3 crypto people hate them, but yet, there's more of them every year. Hmm. Yes, Dogecoin was a joke, but it's still here. I wonder if S--tcoins are like Twilight -- everyone says they hate it, but it makes a bazillion dollars and the haters have seen at least one movie, while their moms have read every book twice.

The funnier thing is that some people call them S--tcoins and then turn around and invest in them, just to see what will happen! No lie! Wait a minute. You know this is crap; you even call it crap; then you throw money at it? Please don't tell me you vote the same way. But hey, if you need to act that way, I'll DM you my ETH address and you can send me the money you're spending on coins you hate. I'll be way more productive with your money -- promise.

Then there's people who run around spreading FUD about Bitcoin, because, they want so badly to be important. Remember those people addicted to gossip in jr. high? "Did you hear what Jimmy did last night behind the Circle K?" I think these are the same small people, thinking that the secret to fame and fortune is making up junk on Twitter (a service so unimportant that its audience is less than 1/10th of internet power users). I bet more people have been banned from Twitter than use the service. Anyhow, what are the Bitcoin Fudsters after -- journalist intern positions?

Next up, the hypebois. I could write a book about the spazoid shiny-shiny crowd, always thinking utopia is around the corner, and this time they've found it for real! Every new thing is delivered with breathless excitement and shouted like it was the cure for cancer. The fact that the hype always boils off to reveal something broken, mediocre, or usually nothing at all, doesn't curb their enthusiasm. No, they're on to the next thing, and then the next thing...These are the people who have storage vaults full of yesterday's magic items that aren't quite so magic now. Silly little hypebois.

And of the course, the funniest thing of all - government. Its spokespeople say crypto is the wild, wild West, like that's a bad thing. You're talking to people whose ancestors explored unknown territories and settled wild lands -- did you really think we'd be scared? Most people I know aren't frightened by a lack of laws. Caveat Emptor comes right before E Pluribus Unum in the American dictionary, am I right? Also, they think that we don't know that the wild, wild West is largely the creation of another mythmaking industry, Hollywood. So you're trying to tell us where we hang out is really something bad but that bad thing is entirely fictional. Huh what? How is that supposed to work?

I'm sure I'll discover more hilarity as I go along, so if I've missed something, let me know. I'll check it out and if I laugh, look out for another article!