As one Human among seven-plus billion others, now seven-plus decades into this existence on this planetary spaceship traversing the great cosmic unknown, toward a destination of even greater speculation: what compels me to believe in a topic much has been done, and many have taken significant strides to discount, and worse, discredit?
Since an early age, becoming increasingly cognizant to a world outside my limited state of consciousness, and awareness; the first being shaped by the ethos of religion as espoused by Roman Catholic dogma, raised the questioning specter of `belief’. Especially that of an unseen entity known as God, and his selfless Son: Jesus.
The tragic gift of extreme short-sightedness, compounded by a penchant for breaking my visual aid of expensive eye-glasses, to my father’s dismay; I became very introspective during my many episodes of delinquent attendance to Sunday Mass, simply consuming the prescribed amount of time spent in Church, by walking endless footsteps, unseeing anything within mere feet before me: buried in `thought’ of my simple mind’s creation.
By the time I had turned nine, coming to the realization I saw, or didn’t, see things differently than most within my limited sphere of being, not totally hermetic, but increasingly so, I came to the realization too that I could be Gay. (The time being the late 1950’s `Gay’ was not established as relating to male-homosexuality, but suffice it to say: I was enamored by the males of my acquaintance, more than females.). This eventual realization maturing in thought as I passed through puberty, gave reason to reach deeper into the state-of-mind; to raise question for possible answer to all the mysteries life increasingly presented for want to understand.
Contrary to current access to information via the Internet; growing up in age of newsprint, and television news and entertainment limited awareness to the unusual especially in the realm of UFO’s (Unidentified Fly Objects), or as referred to today: AFP’s (Arial Flying Phenomenon). These principally being the subject of science-fiction novels by such famous authors as Isaac Asimov, and Ray Bradburry, the latter being the creator of the infamous Star-Trek series. [https://youtu.be/ZyTyrZFqmzE]. The topic captured my imagination then, and to this present day.
As reader, you may ask: what does being Gay have to do with the potential existence of UFO/AFP’s; where is the connection?.
The straight-answer [pun intended] is two-fold: firstly, and possibly difficult to fully appreciate by those who have not from a very early time in their life presence be obliged to examine their sexual orientation, but their entire reason for being in the context of `others’ as to incite deep reason for introspection, and possibly more significantly: compelling reason for extrospection of the world of beliefs to which you are borne.
Second: having personally experienced, on two distinct occasion, mysterious phenomenon few may have had the fortune to experience directly:
The first occurred in the late 1990’s while driving; it was the start of dusk, the full sky a deep hue of Sunset pink within there was a massive, perfect circle, distinctly discernable due to its being slightly lighter hue than that which encircled it. At first thought, it was just a freak weather phenomenon until: within a split-second or less, the sphere closed in unto itself as does the shutter of a camera lens, rendering the entire sphere gone, and the entire sky consistent with the darker hue of Sunset pink. One might assume it to be a dimensional portal, a shift in the matrix, or frankly; who could know other than it being a real and observable event.
The second, and more graphic, and real: while visiting my brother in Phoenix, Glendale to be exact, he and I walking in his neighborhood, I happened to look up to see, approximately a few-hundred feet above me, a double diamond shaped object, red in color, slowly floating by as it softly rotated on its vertical axis. The rotation being known by the Sun’s periodic reflection on one side of the object. Then, appearing out of no-where, following the same motion and path trajectory of the first, a second object, but this one was black in color. Both are now silently drifting across above my head. The strangeness of this: alerting my brother who walked a few meters ahead to take notice of the objects, looking upward claimed he saw nothing as I described what I was seeing. Astonished he could not see what was obvious to my eyes, I followed both as they proceeded and eventually the black object dissolved into the sky, as the red object carried on, eventually dissolving into the light of the sky.
Beyond these direct, relatable experiences, there have been several events manifesting more questions than answers throughout my life. Experiences many explain as mere coincidence, or indulgence of imagination, or twists of fate; however what they are in the end is the willingness to go beyond the binary to explain, to compel one into the `Belief’ there is far more than that which the senses-given allows to know is real.
To conclude: what inspired the writing of this essay is encountering a documentary on the topic of Disclosure of the UFO/AFP phenomenon titled: Unacknowledged: An Expose' of the World's Greatest Secret [https://youtu.be/n7HXocgnExw], and to bring to the attention of those whom inexplicably have ignored, have had no interest in the topic, or just not willing to `believe' as result of the subject being tarnished under the classification of `conspiracy theory'. It's hoped in doing so: on behalf of the minds' of the few; Compel Belief, by the minds' of the many !
The End, or is it?