The Misguided Crypto Miners (Skit)
Characters:
- Kwame: An overly enthusiastic crypto novice with wild ideas.
- Mobolaji: Kwame's skeptical yet easily persuaded friend.
[Scene opens with Kwame furiously typing on a laptop, while Mobolaji watches him with a mixture of amusement and confusion. A tangled mass of wires leads to a tired, old PC and an assembly of household fans blowing at full blast.]
Kwame: (eyes wide with excitement) Mobolaji, we gonna be rich! This rig will mine crypto coins as if it's digging for gold in the Sahara!
Mobolaji: (squints at the setup) Bro, the only thing you're mining is our patience... and maybe an electrical fault.
Kwame: (waves off his concern) Scrap that! I used Auntie Ngozi's blender to improve the cooling system!
Mobolaji: (facepalms) That's a smooth disaster waiting to happen.
[Suddenly, the lights flicker and become dim. A power strip begins to smoke.]
Mobolaji: (alarmed) Kwame, your... 'state-of-the-art' rig is cooking up a blackout!
Kwame: (clapping hands in a dismissive way) Relax! That's just the sweet smell of... (sniffs air) Okay, that's burning. Unplug it!
[Mobolaji leaps to unplug the mess just as sparks shoot out. A blackout follows. They sit in the dark; the only light left is the battery-powered glow of the laptop.]
Mobolaji: (sarcastically) Brilliant. Now we're mining darkness.
Kwame: (unperturbed) No problem! Let's check our earnings from today!
[He confidently taps the keyboard. The laptop screen shows they've earned the equivalent of one dollar.]
Mobolaji: (deadpan) Wow, so we're basically millionaires if we start counting in dollars.
Kwame: (fetches a kazoo and starts playing a happy tune) Time for our victory song!
[Mobolaji slaps the kazoo away.]
Mobolaji: I think our victory song should wait till we earn enough money to buy a loaf of bread.
[The lights come back on. Kwame gets excited.]
Kwame: (snaps fingers) I got it! Solar panels! With all the sun light we've got, we'll have 24/7 mining!
Mobolaji: (eyes widening) And if we throw in a wind turbine, we could power up the whole village!
[They share a moment of excitement, but then both look out the window at the calm weather.]
Mobolaji: Maybe we should start small, yeah? Like... mining when the toaster isn't being used?
Kwame: (nodding) Strategic. (pauses) Speaking of toasters, did we ever stop the one in your room from overheating?
[They both rush out, leaving the stage in chaotic noises - beeps, blaring fans, and a distant "Not the toast!" cry.]
[Scene shifts to the porch. Kwame and Mobolaji sit, each holding a piece of toast bread, looking at the stars.]
Mobolaji: (takes a bite of his toast bread) Maybe plain bread isn't so bad...
Kwame: (nodding, munching toast) Tomorrow, we rise with the roosters. Crypto waits for no man!
[End ]
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