If you want to make money, pay attention to when you give it away. If someone has a method that works on a wise and frugal consumer like you, you can probably make it work on the public as well. I’m not a wise and frugal consumer like you. I went out one night with the goal of burning my Christmas bonus. But I paid attention to it, and I learned some interesting lessons from the pretty girls at my local strip joint. Here’s how the interaction went down:

I walk in, flash my ID, pay the cover. I sit down, order a beer, and an above-average blonde girl in lingerie joins me in exactly 1.4 seconds.

“Hey there, I’m [Name],” she says.

“Hi, how are ya?”

“Good. Did you just get here?”

“Yeah, I just sat down.”

“Cool. Yeah, it’s pretty slow, I think I’m gonna get out of here soon. Are you interested in a private dance?”

“Maybe, how much?”

“$35.”

I notice a sign by the booths. “That sign says $25.”

“I charge $35.” she says.

“You must be pretty special then,” I say, reminded of a similar hustle that a taxi driver once pulled over on me.

“I am, I have a tattooed asshole,” she says.

I agree to the dance. She leads me back to a booth, shuts the curtains, and gets to work. She really does have an ink spiderweb around the back door. I find myself forgetting the dance and wondering about the logistics of getting an asshole tattoo. I give the girl her $35 asking price, plus $5 for answering some questions for an article I was writing.

Let’s analyze this interaction, and learn a thing or two from this trained professional:

People Don’t Value Free Things

A cover charge is insurance that the house still gets paid in the unlikely event that you don’t drink anything, but it serves another purpose. When you have to pony up a little extra just to get through the door, you become more invested in the time spent here. You’ll hang out longer. You buy more beer. You throw more cash at the dancers. The cover was only $5 so I didn’t have to stay long to get my money’s worth- but I did it, by God!

Be the first to engage your client

My 3-minute companion joined me so fast that I’m pretty sure she watched me walk through the door. All the prettier girls were tied up with bigger spenders and I obviously wasn’t there to watch football. She knew she had good odds as long as she got to me before anybody else, and she was right. If your customer isn’t picky, speed is of the essence. Get there first and make your pitch before anybody else gets the chance.

Create scarcity for your product

My girl was very quick to inform me that she wouldn’t be around very long. My time was limited. I had to act fast if I wanted her to passionlessly grind in my lap. Scarcity creates value, and the fear of missing out can speed up the decision making process of a buyer who is on the fence. (Note: that line was bullshit. I saw her schmoozing dudes for the rest of the night.)

Charge more if you’re worth more

I wonder how many girls in that club have a tattooed asshole. I wonder how many girls on planet Earth have a tattooed asshole. The opportunity to peek at a painted pooper comes around once in a lifetime, and it commands a higher price tag. Most people would have dropped that negotiation as soon as they learned they could get it cheaper elsewhere. The rest of us are curious about body art in weird places. There’s an option for us which costs only $10 more. And so it should, otherwise the half-naked hustler wouldn’t make any money back on her expensive (and painful) investment.

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