Just a summary of my personal experience with addiction and psychedelics.
Whether we know it or not, most if not all of us have had or will experience some form of addiction in our lives. Too much of anything will make you an addict if you're not careful and self aware. For me it was many things, but mainly drugs. Enough that it would be faster to name the ones I haven't been addicted to than the ones I have. The kind wrapped itself around me and gripped the tightest were opiates.
When you spend the better part of your life from an early age using substances for, well just about any reason you can think of, it can become tremendously difficult to live any other way. After over a decade of the same old, living this lifestyle just wasn't doing it for me anymore. No colour to life. Tried to quit many times but the thing that always brought me back was simply how boring life felt without it. Hanging out with people, doing normal things and wondering how they can enjoy it so much. Everything was dull, completely void of sensation. BORING.
During my younger years I had always taken psychedelics spontaneously with friends for recreation. Mainly mushrooms, LSD and a bit of LSA on my own. Had the opportunity to try DMT at a party but I knew it wasn't the setting for it and to be honest I was rightfully scared to try it.
Fast forward to 2018, some time after a horrible breakup and some worse decisions, I'm at rock bottom. Doc had me on SSRI antidepressants for a while, only made me worse. I woke up one day and thought, why don't I try some psilocybe. So I did. First I took a few weeks to get off my meds and after suffering withdrawals I started micro dosing mushrooms every few days. Almost instantly the withdrawals became manageable. I continued micro-dosing and every few weeks I would take a few grams for a trip. I don't know what changed in me, but all of a sudden I just didn't really care about the drugs anymore. Don't get me wrong, I still would do some every once in a while but I never felt that grip of addiction trying to pull me back.
It hit me again. 2020, need I say more? I had still been doing good, but no longer had I been micro-dosing for quite some time. I had a bad back injury preventing me from working, walking, sitting.. Pretty well anything aside from laying on the hard floor. Obviously I feel that pull coming back with vengeance. This time I stay strong, what worked before may work again. However this time around I decide I'm ready to finally take a leap into the DMT realm.
The experience hit me hard, in the best way. By far the most overwhelming experience of my life. I'm not great with words so to describe it would do it no justice but something that I took from the experience was that I don't have to carry all the weight that I'm so desperately holding on to. It forced me to deal with things I didn't even realize I was burying within myself. Since then I haven't felt the urge to get high. I felt good. I still micro-dose intermittently with mushrooms and I'm sure the pull of addiction may return at some point yet my perception of it has completely changed in a way that I feel confident I will never use addiction to help me carry a needless weight again.
*I don't condone the use of any drugs*
It's just my opinion that some psychedelic drugs can be (if used properly) a very beneficial tool in the healing process of addiction and other mental health problems. They helped me immensely in ways I couldn't find the words to describe in this post, where as prescription medicine made me much worse. I hope more people will realise the medicinal value of psychedelics.
Thanks for reading, cheers!