Dear Crypto fans, with demesnes everywhere, at whatever magical time y'all pick this up - we love you. It's honest work. Bless y'all for being part of the wave theory of ciphercoins.
We do love you. For some of y'all, this means we treasure the snidest quips from yer stanky 'tudes, begging y'all to be skeptical but not cynical, we know it's hard but it's worth it.
For the wonderful others, 0xtalk constantly amazes us, geniuses trying to jack open rusted shut minds to let intellectual sunshine in. Souls sharing life and love in honest news cycles.
In the 60's in Detroit if a house had a boomy wooden "entertainment center" and an Aquarius album, it was dance like a fool time!!! To let the musical sunshine in. 
Just doesn't get any better than that. Then, now, It's a great time to be alive, thanking you, have a unicorn lovely day. A swanky crypto startup unicorn these days, not just love, rainbows, lollipops and I-80 traffic magically cleared by a unicorn on the dashboard.
Galaxy 500, Jesus on the dashboard, t-minus whenever it FEELS RIGHT 
let's open the FT!!
Sir Barclay's fams came up with a million for his legal team, but just can't find that $100mm alimony....
CRYPTO news....well, the IMF, seemingly running the world lately, says GDPs are going down and inflation's going up. Could it have anything to do with doling out billions of freshly printed fiat while knifing bitcoin bonds?
Tunisia has flipped democracy to go back to basically a dictatorship. Surely just coincidence - Tunisia's debt to GDP hit an ALL TIME HIGH in 2020.
Wall street chestnut: Just because yer paranoid, doesn't mean they are NOT out to get ya!!!
Here we find the ~third gaming review, all based only on Steam, which never allows crypto. Is Tom violating a chinese wall for the FT's neutrality?
TLDR: You play Stray as a cat dropped into a cyberpunk underworld. It's funny, cause even Tom references cats as crypto icons in the story. Steam loves Stray, others say asian cyberpunk cliche.
The REAL story: Ya ya ya, Stray is a big hit - for Steam. Dear readers know we won't let a point go, but check this:
Three bestselling games of 2022 so far? are Elden Ring, Lego Skywalker, and Mario Battle league. Elden's owner just dumped 24 mil into crypto, link below. Lego has EVERYTHING crypto including wallets. *$&#*&$^$#!!! Super Mario has his own ERC-20 coin, MARIO, link below.
So excuse us for smelling an FT anti-crypto rat. Sorry Tom, ya seem like a nice gamer but take one FU for the FT team for serially ignoring crypto gaming. Invest in Ultra NOW!!!!
Ok that was a plug for Sugar, but moving on...
Dear readers remember our whinging that Gensler is trying to railroad crypto = securities through a cheezy civil insider trading case against low-rent tipsters sans good lawyers, calling it the most important financial case in the world. Ignoring the CFTC case law precedents and jurisdiction.
Gary seemingly has lost the crypto = securities case against Ripple Labs. We asked Gary to stay upright and at the front door.
Well be careful with wishes, cause here comes Gary swinging an AXE at COINBASE!!! 
Good on Gary for at least TRYING the correct way again. A lot of outlets have covered this spat. The FT boils it down: CLO Paul says "come at me bro," he is looking forward to engaging with the SEC. LOL!!
Details NOT in the FT: Coinbase specifically debates if any coin could be considered a security pre-launch, had the SEC review the reviews, and asked for more SEC rules. Top lawyer Paul feels great like XRP. Coinbase stock took a hit. Another huge victory for lawyers getting paid !!! but that's about it.
The big crypto article - first thing we do is we pay all the lawyers zillions to consider settling the most basic questions.
TLDR, Tether loaned Celsius most of a billion dollars, accepting 130% of over collateralized bitcoin as security. When BTC tanked, Alex the machine could not make a margin call on the loan, so Tether and Celsius agreed to liquidate. Tether was paid back, Celsius got the change and booked a $100mm loss. Simple, right?
Not once the lawyers step in. A textbook example of why Sammy was right - drawn out bankruptcy circuses eat shareholder value for lunch. Very nice lunches, ~forever.
The FT quotes FOUR titillated legal sources, reveling over the joys of paying lawyers to argue how many angels can dance on a bankrupt crypto. If this sounds insane, it is. Tether thought they had a secured loan. But did they pay enough lawyers?? oh tee hee hee, maybe not.
Lawyers say corporations must "perfect" their claim on collateral before liquidation. Traditional law for money is physical possession means perfection. Lawyers jump up and down in joy!! cause El Salvador calls BTC money, so now it is money in court. And hairsplitting lawyers say bitcoin CANNOT be physically possessed!!! FU!!!!
The law is the Universal Commercial Code. In more red tape and bills flying, the UCC is being updated to, duh, recognize crypto control as possession. Excited lawyers say that's not yet law!!
Current best practices in paying crypto lawyers too much $$$ include filing an UCC claim, or handing off assets to a third party. It doesn't look like Tether did either one. The FT is happy to think maybe USDT reserves will get scr-wed if Tether is litigated into being an unsecured creditor who illegally went to the front of the line to grab Celsius assets.
The real story: Howcum the FT never does a NON crypto story with these ultimate low effort graphics?? Dear readers know we think it's BS that Celsius pays lawyers, who are then motivated to screw Celsius clients on behalf of Celsius management. Here we see lawyers screwing everybody on behalf of themselves, defeating a common sense situation with their lawyer tricks.
How do lawyers sleep? They lie on one side, then lie on the other. A bad lawyer can let a case drag on for years. A GOOD lawyer can make it last even longer!! How can you tell a roadkill skunk from a lawyer? There are skidmarks trying NOT to hit the skunk. Ba da BING!!
Try the borscht, we'll be here all week.
peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars
Harmony and understanding
Sympathy and trust abounding
No more falsehoods or derisions
Golden living dreams of visions
C'mon FT, lose the lawyers, take the crypto, let's dance!!
Love,
Dave
