(photo courtesy of Matheus Bertelli)

Okay, this post is a little off the blog topic but since it involves relationships, stress and a cookie, I'm hoping you will give me some leeway and have a good chuckle.

Since we started going up north to camp next door to my sister, I've had the opportunity to interact with my nieces more as I'm usually around to chat when they call my sister. I've been trying to be a good auntie and check in with them now and again since we started camping up north.  One of my nieces has a teenaged daughter who recently got her driver's license and was gifted a used car by her dad's parents. 

The running joke with my niece these days is that she is experiencing the "you don't know anything" and "you can't do anything right" times with her 16-year-old daughter (whose real name is not 'Missy'). I usually ask her how the teenage parenting is going, as I myself have been there and have experienced similar times. Today I reached out to her to say hi and asked her "Are you surviving being the parent of a teenager", and I got this response, which I just had to share:

"Hi Auntie, nice to hear from you. Things have been OK, I suppose. Surviving 'Missy' is actually a perfect word to describe it. I call it, the many moods of 'Missy.' Of course, she doesn't know I call it that and would flip out if she knew lol. One day at a time as far as that's concerned. I celebrate the small "wins" she and I have and pick and choose my battles carefully. I have driven with her one time in her car since she's had her license, and I probably won't do that again for a while.

We went to *clothing store* and then to *cookie shop*. Unbeknownst to me, I wasn't allowed to eat in her car, so you can imagine the look she gave me when I proceeded to take out my Reese's Peanut Butter Cup cookie, drizzled with peanut butter sauce and took a bite.  I ended up having to put the cookie away and then wasn't allowed to touch anything with the hand that I used to pick up the cookie.

I was given a napkin, which I was not allowed to get for myself, then had to dispose of the napkin into a designated trash bag that she had hanging from the back of my seat, argued with me about putting it into my pocketbook, when there was a perfectly fine trash container for this specific purpose in the vehicle, then closely watched me out of the corner of her eye the entire ride home to make sure I did not touch anything with that hand that held the cookie.

I had asked several times what was new, trying to start small conversation then was snapped at. I had already talked to her about everything that's new and how come I'm asking her that again? What? Do I not remember the conversation we had? Was I not paying attention? Then, when I thought it would be best to just sit quietly and peacefully..... bad idea on my part. Once again, I was accused of being mad at her, not talking to her, staring out the window because I couldn't wait to get back to the house. 

That was probably the most stressful car ride I have ever taken in my entire life.

So, yes, I am surviving at best."

My response to that text was: "I. Am. DYING. Laughing.... Oh My GOD!"  I then went on to tell her that we all go through this angst, and that she could call me to vent about it anytime she wanted. 

There is truly only one thing (other than wine) that will get you through the raising of a teenage girl. A sense of humor. In fact, that is something that can get you through many, many stressful situations in your life. Sometimes you have to just laugh at the absurdity you are faced with on a daily basis. I'm guessing (hoping) my niece did that today.

Even though a ride with my great-niece in her car would have been beneficial for my calorie deficit diet (no cookie eating), I would have needed at least three cookies after the ride.....

I'm sure those of you who have been fortunate enough to have survived raising teenage girls (boys are a different breed of teenager) have a lot of empathy for my niece.

For those of you going through it, I hope you know that you are not alone and remember the phrase "This too shall pass..."  In ten years, you will be the most intelligent, insightful and wonderful person in their life.  

For the rest of you: BEST BIRTH CONTROL EVER!

P.S.

If you need a good punishment for a teenage girl, a parent/guardian gets to pick out their school clothes for a week. Courtesy of a family I knew that had three girls, all a few years apart in age.

Happy parenting y'all!