So, the Bodyguard and I became a thing. I had no difficulties closing down the various dating apps and commit myself to this relationship. Afterall, I have a track record of monogamy and faithfulness for 29 years, so if I am committed, I am hundred percent.

It didn’t matter that it was a long-distance relationship, that actually gave me the best of both worlds. My freedom to handle my daily life as I want and a boyfriend at the same time. Win/Win situation in my point of view.

He came 2-3 times a month, and we hade a few intensive days before he left again. And if I must be honest, then I always began to think about day 2 that it was about time that he left. He was sweet, but there were also times where the communication wasn’t that well. He talked a lot about his past, which clearly had traumatized him, and I can see why. If just half of the stories were true, my heart bleeds for him.

But even if we did not see each other that often, we connected several times a day by either phone or messages and he told me about his very exciting life. There was always some kind of drama. Criminals who were apprehended when he was at work, some that got away, colleagues who were hurt on duty, robberies etc. etc. And as we have established, I am the curious type and I like to hear about other peoples lives. And he had loads of dramatic adventures to talk about.

And not only on the work-side, but also in private … always drama. The longer I got to know him, the more drama there were.

It started (and eventually ended) with his living conditions. He had been living in a company apartment as he almost always worked, which made sense. Then at some point he had to share this apartment with a colleague, and that wasn’t so good, so he moved out and lived part time at his one sister on the island (East Denmark) I mentioned before, and part time at his security partner and best friend, who lived about 1½ hour drive away from me in the western part of Denmark. That made sense because he worked all over the country. But now he was looking forward to moving to this house, which he had told me about. He needed a place of his own, he said, which I completely understood.
He showed me pictures, a house very large in a bigger city, and I asked him how he could afford it. And he just said that he had the money. His grandmother had left him an inheritance plus he earned well working in security. Especially the private bodyguard jobs gave a lot.

We were together whenever possible for my childfree weeks and his work, and every time I had to drive an hour to the train station to get him. His car was never available. Fair enough. I didn’t mind, because we always had 1-2-3 days together, before I should drive him back to the train station.

Then came the time, where he should move into this house. It was postponed. First the landlord hadn’t managed to get the apartment done, then the landlord got corona, then the landlord DIED of corona, and when the Bodyguard finally got the key from the landlord’s son, he had put all his furniture and stuff into a lorry and when he arrived at the house, it was damaged because of some pipe leakage, so he had to re-locate his stuff and postpone his moving in.

Second red flag … Not just a flag, but warning flashes

And I began to think … this can’t be true. Nobody can have so much bad luck, there must be something else going on. But did I react? Nope … I didn’t.

Why do you ask?

I honestly don’t know.

I believe in the best of people; I don’t assume that people are lying to me. That is naïve, but I also don’t want to be suspicious on forehand. I still believe that people primarily are good. Even if I just had the Caretaker who also was lying to me. But still, I didn’t want to change the person I was, which I think is a warm and openhearted person. If that means that I must take some blows from time to time, so be it. It’s not my nature to be suspicious and withdrawn.

Also … I remember saying to my sister, that WHEN he was here, it was nice for those couple of days, we were having fun, the sex was great, and then he left back to his own dramatic life. Was his life my concern? He didn’t bring the drama back to me, so why would I care?

My sister who is a very sensible woman asked me if I could see any future with him, and what if he actually was married and living with a wife somewhere … I thought about it, but I couldn’t see him being married. So, I WAS aware that something didn’t fit, but … I was perfectly fine with the relationship. It worked in its own strange way. I got what I wanted. I thought.

But the drama …

A colleague got hurt, one even got killed, then his guard-dog was kicked during work and had to undergo surgery and later had to be retired as the dog became nervous. This was a big blow for the Bodyguard. The dog also was his partner and he spent loads of time training it.

But there was ALWAYS something. He went from one drama to another constantly.

In hindsight … he thrived on my compassion and empathy. I know that now. I didn’t then, but I was always there for him – mostly mentally as we couldn’t be together that often – but I was there. I listened and comforted him when it got hard. And I guess he needed to be fed with my compassion and assurance.

At some point his partner and best friend – who was even more muscular and much bigger than the Bodyguard (or … the man on the pictures I saw was) – died. He took some other steroids than he usually took, ate a too large dose, and was admitted to the hospital. Then his organs began to set out, and then he died.

Are you counting? Three deaths, the injuring and retirement of a service/guard dog, a rented house where he eventually cancelled the contract after loads of problems and oh, I also forgot to tell that the Bodyguard also had been attacked and hit very hard in the kidneys and pi**ed blood for a week. This in a period from February to July 2021.

And it got worse …

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