Photo of Mayor Max taken from his official website: Mayormax.com

SAN DIEGO — The Dingo is the first publication to announce that the mayor of Idyllwild, CA, Maximus Mighty-Dog Mueller II, known as Mayor Max, will literally and figuratively run for president in 2024. Mayor Max tells us he will run as an Independent.

“I’m going to make my late-father proud and achieve something no other dog—or non-human animal in general—has ever achieved,” Mayor Max’s interpreter told The Dingo. “The United States is struggling. Conflict, fear, and disease is ravaging this great nation. Our parks—my beloved parks—are threatened by a looming climate catastrophe. What will we do when there aren’t any birds left to chase?” Mayor Max whimpered.

Mayor Max believes that the key to unity is a leader all can trust. And who can Americans trust more than a politically savvy Golden Retriever?

Mayor Max’s campaign manager, a dazzling poodle named Fifi Whitepaw, says that she’s confident Max can handle the challenges of leading the nation. “Frankly, Mr. Mueller II is the most trusted mayor in this country. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that history will remember Mayor Max as one of the greatest leaders in our nation’s history.”

When asked if it’s physically and cognitively possible for a dog to handle the role as canine in chief, Fifi had this to say.

“Frankly, it is discriminatory and bigoted to believe that only humans can do well in governance. That argument makes no sense. Human arrogance caused all the issues the world faces today. Incompetent people have desecrated our great forests and water systems. As for capability, besides Mr. Meuller’s impressive record as mayor of Idyllwild these past seven years, in 1997 Air Bud proved to the world that a dog can outperform humans in virtually any sport. Then, in 2006, Air Bud’s puppies grew to become world-class athletes. Clearly, it was not just a fluke.”

For now, Mayor Max has his paws full handling the novel coronavirus pandemic. After the crisis has passed, he will concentrate on his campaign.

“I can’t wait to sniff the Oval Office when I am elected as the 47th. president of the United States. As man’s best friend, I promise to serve all creatures of our great nation as President Max.”

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