“Your back”. I was overcome with emotion and gave her a long, tight hug. All the while she was looking at her surroundings and then I heard a gasp. She was gaping at her arm.
“What’s become of me. I’m so thin?”
“Darling, so am I. But I’m feeding you double portions now and you’ll recover quickly. Do you remember where you are? Why don’t you take a shower. You’re in reality now and shall be for some time. I’ll tell you everything that’s happened later”.
I stood up to help her out of bed but when she pulled the sheets from her legs she gasped again, this time even louder. She was wearing nothing but her skimpy underwear and her limbs were almost albino pale and shrivelled. As I helped her to the bathroom I tried to reassure her things were only going to get better, though I had no grounds for that assertion.
She closed the door on me and I stood outside waiting to hear the sound of the shower. There was none. Then I heard a sobbing lasting several minutes and knew she was standing at the mirror. Finally the water started up and I left to see what I might find to dress her in when done. I found a bra and a white see through nightgown, the best I could do. The shower was a long one and after that an equally long silence. I guessed she was trying to apply what was left of her makeup. But five years of neglect aren’t easily repaired in a few minutes. Finally I knocked gently on the door and handed in the clothes. A moment later she stepped out.
“I must look dreadful to you” she said, “I can’t believe this change in me”.
“I felt the same way when I woke up. I was shocked at my appearance. But I love you right now more than ever. Sit at the table and I’ll get food and we’ll talk”.
She did just that. I brought out the two meals and went next door for a second chair, then told her briefly of my last three days and how I discovered that electricity clears the mind. I didn’t mention the dead folks. She had enough on her plate to digest.
I showed her the cap and described what I had done. Then I begged her forgiveness for doing it. I mentioned John, whom she remembered well, and told her he’d warned me of dangers at hand and that this was the only way out of it, so my actions were only trying to save her life. She remained strangely silent during all of this. She had no questions, just staring straight into my eyes with a deadpan look as I jabbered on.
But I understood this. To ask a question you need a vantage point, a position from which to ask it, like a pupil querying a teacher. She had none. She was forced awake into an unknown place, an unknown future, a different reality, and I knew it would take her days to fathom this drastic change.
So I asked her to take a walk with me. Arm in arm we strolled up and down the length of the dim, empty hallway many times, saying nothing, until we were tired. Then we closed our door and crawled into our familiar bed, where I asked her about her latest dream worlds and her adventures in them. This gave her a topic she could expand on and she did, telling me tales from the other side for over an hour, until her eyelids began to droop. She fell asleep in my arms, I hope happy.
I was awake a while longer, tormented by a hundred concerns, as if I had an equal number of lice in my scalp biting it. Now I had another being in my care, a loved one to look after, which complicated every move I might make exponentially. But I knew I would never survive this ordeal alone. She would soon recoup and be my helpmate.
So I did the right thing, I decided. And on this topic of help I had another intuition. If the two of us could find another pair of sleeping beauties, why not awaken them. I had the means, not just for company but for strength in numbers, for shared ideas, for pooling our various talents on our one dilemma, survival. I could show them the dead pair and insist we were all slated for the same ugly end. I just hoped I could find such a duo in this building and determined to search every unit the next morning with Mary in hand, explaining my plan (as if I had one) and a reality check for her. On this rich thought I fell asleep.
