Publication in Russian on the Zen blog
https://dzen.ru/a/aal7di-Sm2xWuW4E
The tale of how a friend Kolya came to the patriot Vasya.
A friend of Kolya came to the patriot Vasya.
He sits down on the sofa: Listen, there's a spring sticking out of the sofa. And the skin is torn.
Vasya: It's obvious right away that you're a negative person and an all-rounder.
Kolya: What do you mean? I just had a spring in my side.
Vasya: Yes, you always do. You come and start looking for some flaws, but you don't see the main thing — the sofa is ours. Native.
Kolya: I'm not arguing. It's just that it's broken. It should be repaired.
Vasya: Where is it broken? You've just been brainwashed. If the spring sticks out, then it must be so.
Kolya: Do I need a pain in my side?
Vasya: You just hate the couch. If you loved me, you wouldn't have any pain, you couch potato.
Kolya: Why would I hate him? I'm okay with sofas. I'm talking about the fact: the hole, the spring, it's uncomfortable to sit.
Vasya: Here! You're a "hole", "spring", "uncomfortable" again.
And you look wider. But the sofa is stable, stands in its place, does not bend under other people's asses.
Kolya: But he bent under mine, and literally.
Vasya: So you're not sitting right. We must sit with respect and understanding.
And if you criticize, suggest it. And you're just rocking the couch.
And anyway, if you feel so bad, you can go to another sofa. Where it's softer. But no one will be happy to see you there.
Kolya: I don't need another sofa. I wish this one didn't hurt people.
Vasya: Exactly. First, the "spring", then the "lining",
and then you say — the sofa is wrong, its history is wrong, and in general — it was not invented that way.
Kolya: I only said one thing: it needs to be repaired.
Vasya: Repair is the way to collapse.
First the renovation, then the rearrangement, and then it turns out that you don't like the room either.
Kolya: If it's dripping from the ceiling, I'll tell you about it.
Vasya: Dripping means it's raining. Rain is a blessing. If you don't like the rain, then you're an atheist.
Kolya: Do you even hear what you're saying?
Vasya: Do you hear the sofa?
He's silent. So, everything suits him.
Kolya: The sofa doesn't talk because it's a sofa. And it creaks a lot, by the way.
Vasya: Exactly. And you talk too much. But you have to be patient!
Kolya: Endure what?
Vasya: The springs. Holes. Inconveniences.
Because a sofa is not just furniture. It's a symbol.
Kolya: A symbol of what? That the sofa needs to be updated?
Vasya: It's a symbol that not everything has to be convenient for you personally.
Kolya: Then don't be offended if no one wants to sit on it.
Vasya: Nothing. But those who stay will sit properly.
And you get out of here, you liberal and traitor.
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My hobbies are history, philosophy, psychology, music, economics, politics, and sociology. I write about this and much more. Professional model. She has performed at international music festivals. I dance, I sing, I parody the voices of the performers. I am studying in the Netherlands at the Academy of Arts, Faculty of Film Industry and Arts. Co-owner of a video studio in St. Petersburg.
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