"If I could run, I'd leave this town, I'd bury myself under the ground.
As did I, we drink tonight, we drink to die.
Far from home, elephant guns, erase my troubles one by one.
[...]
And it rips through the night, all night, all night
And it rips through the silence of our camp at night
And it rips through the silence, all that is left is all that I hide."
— "Elephant Gun" (misquoted); Lon Gisland EP (2007); Beirut
"[It's] how I feel when I’m honest about my life, that juxtaposition of melancholy and loneliness with the absolute enjoyment and happiness of being alive."
— Alma Har'el, director of the music video for Elephant Gun
It's still a bit early in the day for the Noonday Tune (which I haven't posted in a while), but anyway, I have stuff to do and so I'm getting a head start by writing the daily post so that it's done and I can move on to the boring stuff that's apparently/supposedly necessary for getting back to farming fiat ...
Whitting's Elephant Gun, from Borderlands
I took my dog out to pee about half an hour ago (since it was restless and is also bad about going out in foul weather, not that I blame it for that), to find that there is actual snow falling, not just rain. It's small and melts as it hits the ground, but still ... There's actual snow in the Midlands, on a freezing cold and cloudy day. I don't have my gloves because they stink of dogs and need to be soaked (again).
I haven't even had breakfast yet or made myself a cup of tea because every time I leave my room, I get shat on by my landlady whom is in a foul mood for FSM knows what reason. (At least I have the sense to stash food in my desk draw and car, since that has helped keep my hunger pangs at bay many a time, but it's far from ideal.) I really want to get a job, get as far away from this town (even country, with its shitty infrastructure ) and buy some new clothes, change my identity and start a new life, effectively ending my current one. If that doesn't start happening by the end of this month or next, I don't think it ever fucking will. I have run out of time and money, yet again. Even just the process of getting prescribed drugs that help me cope/deal and function like a somewhat normal person is taking a long time, but at least it's happening, I am getting help and have someone on my side for a change (instead of mostly going it alone).
In unrelated news, a few days ago I became suspicious that Presearch isn't paying me out for my searches, like it used to. Indeed, when I investigated this morning (by looking at my rewards payout history), I can clearly see that it last payed out at the end of last month. I tried closing the tab, logging out and back in again, even using a different browser. All of this had no effect. That's so not cool, man!
I sent an email to the Support department this morning, stating as much. They have been fairly helpful in the past, so hopefully they can sort out my account. It's taken me years to get to ~66% of the way to claiming my first 1000 PRE (since I don't use the search engine even half as much as I could/should). I don't want to stop now, post-meridian, despite the fact that PRE has pretty much done nothing but tank in that time.
It looks like I'm going to be spending the rest of the month (and those that follow) applying to jobs, then checking and responding to (id est, deleting) emails that tell me my application has been received but nothing more. Oh, what fucking fun I have, defeated yet again and still stuck in the same old pointless routines!
All the right people look squeaky-clean. All the right people mean nothing to me.
Just another six followers to go to reach 400. Still not a patch on Zero or PVM, but getting there slowly. Woot!
Thumbnail image: Photo by Cottonbro Studio
