Shitty Altcoin Monetary Policy Forecasts Shitty Fed Monetary Policy
fed policy will be just like these shit altcoins

Shitty Altcoin Monetary Policy Forecasts Shitty Fed Monetary Policy

By AlucardLife | cryptoinvesting | 15 Jul 2021

Regardless of how shit the project is, every project created on blockchain technology (assume sufficient decentralization of base layer) is its own mini Federal Reserve. These projects may choose to project themselves as companies, but they are closer to countries than to companies. If you have the ability to mint something of value used as currency and serve as final arbiter of values transferred and held in said value, you are a sovereign.

We've seen enough altcoins in this stage of the game to project what kinds of policies the Federal Reserve might try to implement when it comes out with its SeedyBC. And we know for sure what kinds of policies we should not accept:

Vesting Rewards (Sushiswap/Bao/Hepa): There is nothing more ridiculous than a financial structure using delayed gratification to buoy the price of its token or the value of its ecosystem. In case you haven't been paying attention, the entire notion of delayed gratification was a banker's grift to keep you locked into mortgages, waiting for retirement, and accepting garbage interest rates while they ran off with the bag. Get your money now, especially in crypto. The economic cost of delayed rewards is almost criminal. The capital you lose on a 30 day vest/300% APY is not pretty to look at.

Lockup Funds for Yield (Deus/Rabbit): If you put your funds in a locked contract with the promise of yield, you are asking for a world of shit. The only people making money are the ones speculating on the rest of the unlocked supply. Guaranteed the lock lasts until that speculation has pulled all of the air out of the room. Rabbit.Finance was the worst case of this I've ever seen. Those idiots started a lockup pool, then opened up an unlocked pool 2 weeks later. So everybody ran in, bought Rabbit, drove up the price while the locked Rabbit was stuck, and cashed out before the lockup was over.

Stake4Lotto (YFDai, Duckstarter/DuckDAO, PAID Network, Wault): Complete shit, especially when paired with elastic tiers. Every single one of these garbage launchpad projects started with one set of tiers and changed them on the fly. They all gave the same excuse — that the platform wouldn't be viable unless these changes were made. Why weren't they made up front then? And I'm not sold on guaranteed allocations, either. They guarantee your fucking allocation then just stop launching projects altogether.

Reflect tokens: Maybe it would work if any of these silly projects had any utility outside of the reflection. Unfortunately, most of these fuckin high school projects spend so much time debating how much the reflection percentage should be that there's not enough time to actually come up with a novel way to use the shit.

Tax on entry/exit: This is just another way of saying 'lockup.' Garbage. Those projects with tax on entry and super high APRs/APYs are just trying to fool you into thinking the APY will pay back the tax. Nope. The project will be dead before the APY pays you back. Remember that APYs shrink as more people enter the pool. If you're doing the native token pool, the shitcoin price is also dropping. Also remember that APR and APY aren't the same thing. Some projects play on this ignorance as well. APR is what you should focus on, and you should calculate your returns by the day, not the year (because you won't be in the project for more than a few days, trust me). Use this calculator to translate those shifty APYs into APRs so you can make a real decision about whether the tax can be overcome or not. (TL;DR — no.)

Well Alucard, doesn't that pretty much rule out all of the projects?

Yeah. And that's the point.

Can you imagine any of these shit policies shit through a Federal Reserve CBDC and helicopter shitted into the majority of the world's economies through a continuation of Bretton Woods? Whatever those fucking idiot jackasses at the Fed choose to do — lock up your money, make you endure a vesting period for interest, or stake it for some state sponsored "airdrop," (instead of a new governance token it'll be housing voucher lotto tickets!) you end up losing. This is why centralized monetary policy implemented over an instantaneous digital network must be completely rejected. We've seen far too many examples of complete idiots fucking up shit in altcoin land to ever trust this kind of power to a singular entity.

Don't trust your money to any altcoin with an overly complicated policy. I've seen maybe 3 projects get it right. The rest just fart all over themselves and fuck up your money. Projects with straightforward tokenomics and stake-and-leave-when-you-want liquidity pools are the best bet.


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