1. MELANIA Coin – The $50 I Never Saw Again

Why I bought:
I had just made $50 from a Trump-themed meme coin. I was feeling smart. I told myself, “Let’s flip this into even more with MELANIA — easy win, right?”

What happened:
Gone. Vanished. Rugged or just faded into memecoin oblivion.
My $50 turned into $0.80, and I just sat there staring at my wallet like: “Did I really just trust a coin named after a First Lady?”

What I learned:
Profit isn’t proof you’re smart. Sometimes it’s just luck.
And when you treat a win like an excuse to gamble more… you usually give it all back.

2. A DeFi Protocol With a 9,000% APY (That I Didn’t Understand)

Why I bought:
I saw a number so high it looked illegal. “9,000% APY.” I didn’t read the docs. I didn’t even check the team. I just clicked and farmed.

What happened:
Couldn’t withdraw. The protocol had funky lockup mechanics, and I was stuck with worthless tokens in a pool no one used.

What I learned:
If it sounds like free money, it’s probably a trap.

3. A Project That Only Existed on TikTok

Why I bought:
Some influencer with a ring light and zero credentials said “this is the next Solana.” I didn’t DYOR. I just FOMOed.

What happened:
Turns out it was a copy-paste scam. The contract was paused. The devs vanished. People in the comments were literally begging for refunds.

What I learned:
Just because it went viral doesn’t mean it’s legit.

4. A Web3 Game With a “Revolutionary Roadmap”

Why I bought:
The whitepaper promised a full game, a token, NFTs, staking, a metaverse, and a movie deal (seriously). It sounded like the next Axie. But better.

What happened:
They never shipped anything. The Discord got toxic. The devs stopped updating. Now the NFTs are worth less than a cup of coffee.

What I learned:
A roadmap isn’t a product. It’s a wish list. And anyone can write one.

5. A “Community-First” Token That Rewarded Me With… Nothing

Why I bought:
I got in early. Shilled it. Made memes. Tagged it in tweets. They said active members would be “heavily rewarded.”

What happened:
No token ever launched. Just months of hype and “soon.” Eventually the website died. All I had left was a bunch of effort for a team that didn’t deliver anything.

What I learned:
Community is important. But if the only thing holding it together is hope, it won’t last.

Final Thought: I Don’t Regret Any of It

I lost money.
I made mistakes.
But every L made me smarter.

Crypto is like touching a hot stove — you don’t forget the lesson.
You learn, you grow, and eventually… you stop falling for $MELANIA when you’ve just come off a $TRUMP high.

If this post made you laugh, wince, or remember your own crypto fails — tip if you want. Or drop your dumbest ape story in the comments so I don’t feel alone.

We’ve all been clowns. But at least we’re learning.