Talking about a code of conduct can be a cliché, we often say that we do this or that, but when the time comes, we may have deviated a little. Well, I created a code for myself since I became an adult, a family man and a husband. This idea in my head of following a book of mental rules is basically being a good, polite person, giving the chance to listen and also speak, always with the greatest calmness possible.
Of course, this is just one point among many that I have in mind, but I can say that after I realized that one of my biggest mistakes as a teenager was simply not listening to people, just judging and saying what I think without giving them a chance to speak. It's a time when I'm not very proud, I know that I wasn't such a good person with some friends that I had, so I followed that conduct. I believe that we should stop to listen more than to talk.
Those who know me here at Hive, whether through conversations on WhatsApp or through my random updates that I make on web2 networks and even what I share here at Hive, can get a sense of who I am. I like to talk, to be a nice person and to support people and I especially like to listen (in this case, read) everything that people write. I think we can learn from everyone, in that relationship where I can always teach as well as learn. This can happen to anyone and, with that, I confirm my way of being even more.
This code can be a bit heavy sometimes, I don't deny that sometimes I ask myself why I follow it, why I listen to people, even if they might not be the best of people or, for example, in a complicated moment, in a cycle of fights, I still stop to listen to people. It's bad sometimes, yes, but I still think I should follow it. Every story has two sides, and both parties need to hear these stories so they can be sure of what happened or not. I always say that the biggest distance between two people is misunderstanding.
A more personal example is when my wife and I have the most tense and heated moments, when something didn't work out between us and we argue. I think this is natural in any relationship. We're not perfect, and of course we don't need to fight all the time, but anyway, whenever we discuss the relationship, she usually comes out much more nervous than I do. But I always say something like, for example: "Sit down here, let's talk" or "Explain to me what I did so I can understand better", and well, that helps a lot. She always brings up the points that upset her and that helps a lot to resolve that more complex moment.
This is a code of conduct that I have. It is not always effective, nor does it always solve the problem, but I think it improves things a lot when we decide to just listen first before we start talking or attacking people. You need to be calm and collected. Not everything goes as planned, and that is why you need to have this mindset, of wanting to solve things, of having an open mind to talk. That is why I follow this code of conduct.
This text was originally written by me and was published on Hive Blockchain, a web3 social network.
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