Hi Everyone!
Good morning! Today has been insane! The past few days have been crazy! The phones in my opinion need to be broken because if they ring one more time I'm going to put them down the garbage disposal and flip the dang switch. 
It makes me sick how no one ever bothers to show up, no one calls unless they want money. But when we inform them Grandma is in the hospital they all blow up the phone fake caring. 
I must say the only one who isn't fake caring is one of my cousins. She's very upset right now, she wasn't being informed of just how sick our Grandma actually was. Me informing her of our Grandma's condition was the first she was hearing just how bad things had gotten for Grandma and she broke down. I felt really bad that our family is so despicable that they can't even be honest with their children that their Grandmother isn't well. While they all continue to take advantage. At least this cousin, well, she's a lot like me. She's not one to take advantage of people. She's caring and honest. She works really hard to rid herself of any toxic traits she's carried from our family. We all have them, it's hard not to when this is how we were raised. I have a high respect for my cousin. 
Her father didn't know about our Grandma's condition either. They both currently live in Arizona. So he's offered to pay for her to come see Grandma soon and come stay with Mamma and I. It'll be really nice to spend some time with her and for her to see Grandma. It will be special to have the four of us together. 
Grandma is still in the hospital. For some reason things are very off. They can't quite figure out what's going on this time and what has caused such a drastic decline. They are following Grandma's normal protocol hoping that it shows some progress. But so far nothing yet. She's been there now for three day's and two nights. We are hoping she will be home today, but they may decide to keep her another night. We won't know for sure until the doctors meet in about four more hours from now. 
I've been doing a lot of work on side gigs, taking care of the house and all of the pets. Only one of us was allowed at the hospital and since I don't drive it made zero sense for me to go lol. So I've been at home. 
My night terrors from the traumatic night I experienced at work have been coming back to haunt me. I've been having a really rough time sleeping. Plus my pain level from my Rheumatoid Arthritis and other autoimmune diseases are all back in a heightened flare so my body is majorly breaking down. I think it has a lot to do with all the extra stress. 
I've been dealing with a lot of work stuff. Which you may be asking why, since they gave me the boot. But they're trying to get me to sign a separation agreement. In said agreement they want me to sign my soul basically. They want me to sign away all of my rights and make it so I'm not legally allowed to peruse anything against them legally. All for an exchange of a months worth of pay. 
It's been majorly stressing me out. To sign or not to sign. I have until the 13th to sign it. But I'm not going to sign it. Because if in a few weeks I want to sue them, I want to have that option. If I want to forgive them I want that to be my decision. And I won't sign anything taking the blame for something I didn't do. Not for a months worth of pay especially. And I can legally say all of this because I haven't signed the document and I won't be signing the document. 
I was finally able to file for unemployment. I'm not sure if it's going to be approved or not. They said my rate is only a few hundred dollars a week and I'm like WHAT! I was making over $3000 a month! So if I get approved they won't be paying me out much sadly. But now that I won't be signing the document I have a very strong feeling my previous employer is going to fight me going on unemployment. Because my director is a full blown narcissist and it's simply her style to retaliate. Even though she promised she wouldn't I already expect it. 
Life recently has felt very dark. But right now things are starting to look up. My depression is starting to clear luckily. I'm starting to finally be able to see the stars within the black abyss. 
I lost my job, my Grandma is dying, I broke up with my partner today as it simply was hurting me more to stay. This year may not have an outline. I've never done good without an outline. But it's full of potential. And it's now free. For the first time in forever my life is truly mine and I'm not tied down to anyone or any job. My life is mine. All mine <3. And I'm truly excited to see where I take it this year. 

- Salem