I want to share a story of healing that continues to help me in my spiritual battles today. I hope it may bless you as well. So here it is...

A few years ago I went to a counseling session that my first church in Houston offered at the time. It’s a little known (at least to me) healing therapy called Theophostic prayer. I felt I needed it because I was still dealing with childhood wounds. I felt stuck and unable to move on. You see, even though I had forgiven my dad of the abuse (mostly verbal) I got as a child, I was still battling the debilitating messages. Like a broken record, those old messages would play relentlessly in the background of my subconscious. They basically always said I was stupid, worthless, and I just didn’t matter. I’ve lived my life from that belief. Challenging situations like arguments or failures really exacerbated and solidified the messages. I often felt defeated, depressed, and ultimately, worthless. The therapy session was unlike anything I had ever done. The therapists, two women on staff who had been trained in Theophostic prayer, seated me and briefly explained the process. I remember feeling angry and gripping the arms of the chair in anticipation of what was to come. They essentially prayed over me and asked me to try and go back as far as could remember to a painful scenario. I did that and started feeling really tense. The fear I felt was palpable as I relived that scene. After more prayers, they asked me what I saw. I replied that Jesus was standing there with me and pointing to the scene. They asked if He was telling me anything. I said that as he was pointing, he was telling me that my value was not established there. It took a couple of weeks for that to sink in. The negative messages kept telling me I was worthless but Jesus was telling me I was valuable! He bought me at a high price! (1 Cor 6:20)

I finally felt free from the past and ok about who I am. But, I failed to realize how relentless the enemy is and after some time I forgot about my worth in Christ. I began to judge myself again by the world’s standard...until recently. A Christ centered recovery program reminded of that message Jesus gave me years ago. Now I’ve learned that as many times as the enemy attacks me, I remind him whose I am and how high a price he paid for me! I have a new broken record. I keep reminding myself that my value is not established there (whatever situation is in front of me). Plus, I’ve been studying my identity in Christ. As a result, I’ve been growing much closer to God and falling in love with him and the Word again. It’s been like finding a long lost friend again.

So, I believe that knowing our identity in Christ is crucial to resisting attacks from the enemy and reminding ourselves that no matter what mistakes we make, we are NOT worthless or unimportant. I believe that what Jesus revealed to me is for you too! So, my hope is that if you struggle with harmful, degrading messages from your past, that you would seek your identity in Christ and start your journey toward freedom. I plan on sharing more on this in the future. Until then, I pray you experience the love and healing of Christ. God bless!