Planning for the First Child

Married couples generally encounter less strain in their relationships when they postpone parenthood until they have had time to work out some of their basic adjustments. Research has revealed that the divorce rate is higher among those couples who wait several months or years before beginning to have a children. A higher percentage of couples with unplanned pregnancies early in marriage make poorer marital adjustments than other couples. On the other hand, couples who desire children are the happiest in marriage. These situations support the Biblical teaching that one of the basic reasons for establishing a home is procreation.

Couples who plan to have children should not delay the beginning of their family for too many years. Children make many demands on parents, and parents are in better condition to meet them in their younger years. Also, a couple many discover after postponing pregnancy a number of years that they cannot have children of their own. Fertility decreases with age.

The Frequency of Pregnancies

Too frequent pregnancies are to be avoided for the sake of both the mother and the child. The amount of time between children will depend on the health of the mother and the conditions within the home. Medical opinion advises spacing children at least two years apart. More frequent pregnancies may cause harm to the mother's body which has to assume support for two persons during pregnancy and early childhood.

Certain medical conditions make pregnancy unadvisable. Diseases of the heart and kidneys, tuberculosis, diabetes, previous Caesarean sections, and certain types of psychopathic disorders make childbearings dangerous. Childbearing is, discouraged if a serious physical or mental disorder of the husband or wife might be transmitted to the offspring.

Psychological Preparation

God has decreed that babies are to be born into homes where love, security, and opportunity for Christian instruction exist. Emotionally stable parents have an inner warmth of compassion and desire for a baby. These instinctual desires are seen in the animal world as well. Birds build nests of selected material in preparation for their eggs and the hatching of the young. The mother cat keeps watch over and protects her kittens. A mother joyfully anticipates, plans for, and prays for the safe deliverance of her baby.

Planned conception guarantees a baby's being wanted by both parents. It is important that a baby experience love, warmth, protection, and adequate provision during its earliest stage. The first six years of a child's life determine almost completely his character thoughtout the rest of his life. An atmosphere of devotion to Christ, feelings of affection and respect between husband and wife, kindness, unselfness, and stability are important spiritual attitudes which should form the environment of the new child. Development of these attitudes must begin long before the birth of the child; they must be nurtured by husband and wife from the time of their union in marriage.

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