Since The Loony Liberal seems to have taken an extended leave of absence from Pub0x, with no indication of when he'll return, at least somebody has to step into the fray and bash the bible bashers. Gladly, I will take up that mantle and carry that torch.

"When I hear a man is religious, I conclude he is a rascal, though I know some few instances of very good men being religious."
 — David Hume; philosopher

In my extensive experience with Christians (far more than any other religious people), that holds true. They're some of the most horrible people I've met (and I've met many shitgibbons over the years). If anything, they're far worse than we unbelieving godless heathens. Exactly how much do I loathe the so-called followers of Jesus and his teachings, but whom are actually anything but? Let me count the ways ...

1. Dishonest

Christians are about as honest and trustworthy as a used car salesman. It's hardly surprising, since their good book encourages them to be so and lie like they're Fox News presenters. Yahweh approves.

2. Sanctimonious, Entitled, Rotten Rat Bastards

Christians mistakenly labour under the false belief that they're "the chosen ones" or "elite", all because some stupid book proclaims that they are. The "good book" is rather scarce on facts, folks. In case you haven't already noticed, your self-conferred status as being special/better than everyone else isn't one of them. Shove your holier-than-thou condescension where the sun does not shine. Nobody gave you the right.

3. Lifetime Access to the 88 Club

It's OK to sin and be horrible to other people (non-Christians), as long as you confess to it, ask for forgiveness, say five Heil Hitlers, sorry, five Hail Marys and two Hello Dollys afterwards. Jesus has unlimited forgiveness for his flock, their sins and trespasses against others which means you can have unlimited sins! How cool is that?

4. Hypercritical and Judgemental Morality Police

"Without the bible, we'd have no morality." — Christians in discussions about morality

Oh, hell no, Sonny Jim! The modern world is more moral than what your book of scripture teaches. Adhering to the sort of "morality" taught by Yahweh would land you in jail faster than you can say "despised by the nation". (EG: Deuteronomy states that a woman can be sold into marriage to her rapist for twelve shekels. If you don't find that morally repugnant, y'all motherfuckers need Satanism!) Since Christians believe they are the only ones who know the truth and the definite moral way to live, everyone else is therefore both wrong and immoral. It is therefore their responsibility to police the world and pass judgement on others (including criminals and bi/homosexuals) for their evil/wicked ways (which are mostly minding their own business and getting on with leading their lives as they see fit, free from religion).

5. Hypocrites

Meanwhile, they turn a blind eye to the abuse, greed, gluttony, swindling, theft and other sins of members of the church and slimy poo-fungus filled scumbags like Joel Osteen. (What they do is entirely fine and above board, because they're Christian and, consequently, can do no wrong. It's everyone else whom isn't above board, alright?) Believe me, folks, we see you and have your number.

6. Only on the Weekend (Hey, I'm not in church!)

As long as you behave well and dress appropriately (id est, keep up appearances) when attending church and amongst your own religious community that sees you doing so, it doesn't matter how you behave in front of other people (especially non-believers) during the rest of the week.

7. Scam Artists, Con-men, Swindlers and Thieves

"Never do business with a religious son of a bitch. His word ain't worth a shit, not when he's got the good lord whispering in his ear as to how to fuck you on the deal."
 — William S. Burroughs

If the law of your nation doesn't consider it illegal (and neither does Yahweh), then you're free to do anything immoral/unethical in business. After all, Yahweh's perfectly fine with cheating, lying to and swindling the non-believers (among far worse things); he certainly won't judge you for it.

8. Quoting Scripture Out of Context and Misapplying it

Since it's their book (which they've presumably read cover to cover and know well), Christians have every right to do just that, especially if doing so supports whatever horrible argument they're making against something, right? Right indeed, Alt Right! (They very rarely argue for the advancement of human rights, because most of them are abominably evil/wicked sins in the eyes of their god.) If the rest of us do it, we're just doing the work of the devil, like he did to Jesus in the desert. You see, folks, that's how it works. Hail Satan and pass the holy hand grenade, comrade!

9. (White) Christians Only and Casting Pearls Before Swine

To Christians, their attitudes and behaviour towards the rest of us doesn't matter. That's because, out not believing in "the one twue god" makes us secondary class citizens, subhuman and not worthy of common courtesy, dignified treatment and respect. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. What Christians forget is that Romans used to slaughter Christians (often publicly and for sport), with good reason. That doesn't stop them from having the mindset that "those outside the family of God can be slandered, abused, and swindled", that there are different rules and guidelines for dealing with fellow Christians than there are for non-believers.

If I didn't know any better, I'd ask to see where in scripture that belief is substantiated. However, having read Genesis and Exodus, there are numerous clear examples of how Yahweh treats anyone whom isn't among his "chosen people" (and how he instructs his favourites to treat them), so I know full well that they're considered to be evil and condemned to be slaves, tortured, maimed and murdered in brutally cruel, unusual and vicious ways. The meanness of modern Christians (hopefully nothing more than hurling playground insults on the Internet in most cases) is merely child's play by comparison. Yes, I'm aware that some Christians still maim and kill people whom are different from them (or threaten to), using religion as justification. Unfortunately, that's to be expected from people whom believe in the word of a capriciously violent, intolerant, genocidal, megalomaniacal and bloodthirsty murderous god (to name only a few of his villainous characteristics) and try to appease it. Villain, he is your father (if the Christian bible is to be believed).

Conclusion/Closing Thoughts

"We must please God, rather than men".

As long as you're only horrible to non-christians, but on your best behaviour among those who believe, feel free to be as horrible as you like, safe in the knowledge that Yahweh has no problem with that, actually actively approves.

"You can believe all the right things and still be a jerk. [...] So the emphasis on belief is, I think, modern and mistaken. It's also very divisive — once people start thinking that being a Christian is *about* believing the right things, then anybody's list of 'right things' becomes a kind of litmus test for who's really 'a good Christian' and who's not."
 — Marcus L. Borg; Living the Question 2.0

Live your faith and walk the talk, as difficult or nearly impossible as it is to do that. If you want to claim you're Christian, act like it and don't be upset when people hold you to that. Otherwise, shut up and stop pretending that you follow the teachings of Yeshua and believe in him when you do no such thing. Don't try to hide behind your religion, either; it won't shield you from those of us who see you for the garbage you are. Rather, be honest for once in your lives and admit you're not really Christian, just going along with it for acceptance and protection from accountability, criticism and prosecution.

As Nietzsche said, there was only one Christian who lived the teachings and walked the path of Yeshua: That man was Yeshua himself and he died on the cross. Everyone else is just an imposter/pretender and highly suspicious.

I think that if there's one thing that's worse than knowing a lot and realising just how much one don't know, it's knowing very little, not knowing how much one doesn't know and thinking that one knows everything. Christians are in the latter group, because they've got only one book that purports to have all the answers to life's mysteries (and most of them haven't even read most of it). I, on the other hand, have access to all the works on biology, ethics, morality, philosophy, science, theology, et cetera, that I can get my hands on, in addition to the Christian bible (including the books Constantine excluded and tried to have eradicated from existence). Having read from these many sources in various forms and to various extents, they have informed my thinking and made it obvious that Abrahamic religion is mainly a load of toxic rubbish. (I'm reserving judgement on other religions, since nobody whom believes in them has done me harm as far as I'm aware, certainly not to the extent that Christians have.) Anyone who takes it seriously, believes (in) it (or that it gives them superiority and an excuse to treat others badly) is a fool, quite possibly a simpleton or otherwise mentally deficient. After all, if children aren't thoroughly indoctrinated before the age of seven (the age of reason), they realise that it's nonsense and reject it. Sunday Schools are really indoctrination camps. Onward Christian soldiers indeed ...

The Lord Rorschach hath spoken and it is very good.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk and good day to you. May the FSM touch you with his noodley appendage. Ramen!

Thumbnail image: Bizzaro Cartoon — Various panels on religion and Christianity, by Dan Piraro