I wrote this during a walk home back when my girl was in jail. I specifically mentioned the talk to text because of it’s tendency to absolutely mutilate whatever it was. I was trying to say also my battery went dead so it is unfinished.

let me just pray for a second down my head and close my eyes God thank you for every day and thank you for allowing me to survive. Thank you for all the high all the low in between every minute every second all the magic and the dreams all the tragedies screams laughter pockets full of money bulging at the seams so I can’t fold it. My wallet will shut. I can’t close it every day. Wake up my eyes open. Thank you for the hard times looks I hit the ones I didn’t but I was scoping. Thank you for always giving me hope, let me my dreams video games on stage slapping hands with the fans. I thank you for all the travel all the sites taking me from coast to coast Atlantic, and Pacific Ocean. Thank you for every time I met the love of my life. and how they wreck me and left me heartbroken thank you for making me stronger making me smarter making me tougher day by day thank you for allowing me to finally find real faith. I thank you for giving me all the shit that I say the fuck shit that I’ve done all the fuck shit that I did for my sins I pray that you’re just thinking of me as a kid. I’m smart. I can be never restart just go. My heart might be weaker, but I’ll still fight for what is right. I’m trying to grow. There’s so much I’m trying to see and so much I’m trying to know for me for the clock other than when you were in jail that bitch ain’t never ticking slow. thank you for bringing me here with a purpose. Forgive me through every day where I felt worthless I think you for Gemini gun I had in my head when I pulled the trigger. Let me get rise up again, and I deserve this. Thank you for keeping my face strong, even if I don’t pray every day. I even thank you for taking my grandma. My mom my sister away that’s some fucked up shit for me to say but I feel like as long as they’re with you. I know that they’re OK. I know they’re in a better place with me with you and then watching my back ain’t nothing can fuck with me. I tell people it’s bulletproof and I mean it. It’s the truth I still duck with motherfucker shoot, the truth, the truth about the cheese, the money the spinach have been given just to get it how much pain and suffering and destruction have surfaced what is it? I really think about it. I can tell you. I’m standing on the beach coast when I realized 3 million didn’t feel like enough does what I want can’t buy so what am I giving my life to this for? I’ve always been a hard worker even though I’ve had some broke years where I was laid off just giving up I was stuck depressed and just like always you came back and lifted me up a little bit higher each time back to back out the pipe to the higher that you rise further fall, let’s gravity life, but every time I fall a little bit higher when I’m bounce back this time, I really truly believe I found the love of my life. Will never let me crippled me nice she’s beautiful and it’s pitiful because words can’t do her justice even with my extensive vocabulary. I can’t describe it for real can’t even come close. It sucks because she’s the personification of perfect 37 years of bleeding, getting bruised and beaten, giving up defeated every single bit it was all worth it, never doubted that she was coming once I found God for real she was summon we both suffered along the way, but we found each other in the gutter. I want to take me from her and we love it admitted