In spite of all the overwhelming madness,
I better memorise and not forget:
I have no right to display sadness
Nor should I be allowed to feel regret.

I wish I could be sincere! Yet too bad, no luck...
It pains me to admit that I'm forever stuck
All chained up in that regard, much like a serf, a slave...
It's only natural therefore for me not to receive a grave.

I wish I could be helpful! Yet too bad, I fail,
Even excel at failing when it comes to this.
No matter what I try to do or say - no trail
Of proper support can I leave; I miserably freeze
To remain silent once again...
To still stare blankly at my chain.
With all in vain.
...
How damn
Unbearable it is
This gnawing
This everywhere-following
No matter
The weather
Storm or breeze
It remains
It expands
It grows bigger
It resounds
"Pull the trigger"
So loudly in my head
With awful roar and thunder
It raids my mind, it has it plundered
It leaves my world covered in crimson red
In blood I guess
Oh god please bless
Me already and take away
This
This
Cruel
Pain

I offer up the useless prayers...........
Maaaan what a day
How many of irony layers
Does this at this point have? Mkay

Perhaps this is my ugly
Sincerity. Quite laughable and comic
Now to continue struggling
For life which would've been iconic
Had it been reachable at all...
Iconic, truly! For the whole

Vast population of the world, entire humanity
And then I would've been- don't laugh please-
Loved and praised and valued! No insanity
Would follow me ever again to fight against,
I would
At last
Have been

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