Sirwin
Sirwin

Are All Relationships Transactional?


There are 2 contradicting facts about relationships and love that we often hear:

1. Love is unconditional 

2. Don't stick around in unhealthy relationships

But if love truly was unconditional, why would the health of the relationship matter? Why would we be encouraged to leave those who cause us pain? Why would we be encourage to end relationships that don't make us happy? 

I'm convinced that there's no such thing as unconditional love, or at least there shouldn't be. 

I'm convinced that all relationships are transactional, or at least they should be. 

You make me happy, I make you happy. You make me less lonely, I make you less lonely. You offer X, I offer X in return, or you offer X and I offer Y. But there's usually some transaction. If love was unconditional, we would be encouraged to offer X, Y, Z, Z1, Z2, and Z10000 for free. But no rational person thinks this is healthy. 

So can love really be unconditional if all relationships are transactional? 

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