“Beware that, when fighting wastoids, you yourself
do not become a wastoid... for when you gaze long
into the clown, the clown gazes also into you.”
Pablo Smog

I have gazed long into the floor of the circus, in search of change, and also meaning.

I have studied the philosophy of beasts, slammed

Libraries like dope into my brains.

I have constructed jeremiads out of chewing gum, gone

Fishing for empty cans of wisdom,

Deep within the clown mine.

I have pored over encyclopedias of howling, the history of

Pain, written in cement,

The half-dried pages of a sidewalk.

I have toiled long and hard at the cartoon wheel.

I have swam the grand latrine.

I have eaten from the pig wipe.

I have drank the Irish Sea.

I've been to Tijuana with the Jetsons, and have

Supped with all the Friedrichs, and I can confidently

Say,

When it comes to hospitality,

I prefer the Flintstones to the Nietzsches.

Excerpts from Thus Spake Tweedles/The Philosophy of Instinct, an unwritten book of beastly wisdom by Pablo Smog

Zombie Wastoids Have The Power

Look at Michael
he's a trip
he's gotta angel
on his hip
he looks so cool and effortless
how he does it
I can only guess

He's got a heart-shaped scar
on his hand
he quit his job
he quit his band
tell me someone,
if you see him
he wants to live in a museum

Donut clouds
flagpoles
donut clouds
flagpoles...
Bridges to Heaven

Check out Wendy
she's a cook
she made your bed
she made you look
she rubs her arms
and legs with aloe
beauty is deep,
but she is shallow

She's a complicated chick
she brings you soup
when you're sick
she likes to mess with her own head
she leaves weird sayings
on the sofabed

I need me a spongebath
I need me a spanking
I need me a spongebath
I need me a break!

Oh no,
here comes gay Xavier
another ex-junkie
turned former raver
his favorite drink
is Irish whiskey
it's no secret
he's a sissy

His face looks like guacamole
his breath is rancid
and unholy
he is a perfect example
of everything I'd like to trample

What sssscumssssucking bastard
put out the eternal spittoon fire?

Janet thinks that she's a general
she takes her vitamins
and minerals
with her,
everything is always power
she likes to watch me
in the shower

I once heard her on the phone
her face is pretty,
but her mind is blown
she gets naked for no reason
even if outside it's freezin'

These people are girls!
A mini-mall animal of minimal brains
These people are girls!
Every butterfly I know is a scientifical genius

Lily lives inside the forest
she thinks this song
needs a chorus
she writes me love notes
in Cyrillic
she thinks I am imbecilic

I am a man w/o an anchor
if I see Suzy,
I will thank her
I rode the bus for 20 hours
zombie wastoids have the power

You miserable bastards
have no idea how happy you are

©Nathan Payne