A lot of time we always say "Why me?" To which I always answer most people, "If not you, then who?". If it's not good for you as you claimed, then why would you wish it on someone else? Does that seem fair? It should rather be any other person but not you? We are built differently and we all have the level of things we can handle. I've always said that no one can handle the things I did just as I can never handle half of the things you have handled. The things that sometimes come to us already know that we can handle it even though we sometimes act as though we can't.
Our true strength is from within but often we overlook it because we have always wanted the easy way of things. When we lose someone, we want the whole world to stop and send us condolences but we seem to have forgotten that people die daily and yet the world didn't stop from our side to them. That's the way of life...we feel things deeply and differently.
Whatever we go through in life is an experience we must never waste. We sometimes go through certain things for a reason and it's left to us what we do with it. We can either allow it to shape us or break us but that's left entirely to us to determine.
There is a process to how life works. It's lines upon lines...and the moment you try to get ahead of yourself, you will fall and crash so hard that you would have to repeat the process. That's why it looked like some people repeat a particular pattern because they haven't learnt what they were expected to learn from that experience. With learning comes clarity and with clarity comes better decisions and with better decisions comes advancement because you can do things better which is life's way of giving you another chance.
Your experience is also not just for yourself alone but it can be used to guide others in a similar situation. I am always against when someone is going through something and someone says "I understand". The truth is you can never understand except you have gone through something similar. In my language, they would always say "Se o se e ri?" - meaning "Has it happened to you before?". Most people only want you to feel better when they say "I understand" but the truth is, they don't. No one can understand better than you or someone in a similar situation.
Your experience isn't for you alone but to guide others and that's why we listen to messages and also read books. We want to pack the years of other people's mistakes and learn about them in 6 hours of reading (depending on the volume of the book) which is why we read. I have noticed that all the things I've been through in life or still going through, I will definitely meet someone who needed my help on how I went through it or I know I will still meet people who need my help in sharing how I scaled through it and this is why I keep pushing myself. I don't want to ever tell anyone that I gave up...you shouldn't too.
Life has been designed not to revolve only around you. No one can make it out in this world alone and that's why we need one another. We are to share our experiences which is what I mentioned in one of my posts before now that not everyone needs your money, some just need a shoulder to lean on, someone to comfort them, someone to hear them out and also someone to share their experiences of how they overcame. These little things inspire and has helped a lot of people crawl out of their dark holes.
Just like that popular song that says we have the words to save a nation so we shouldn't bite our tongue. We have spent our lives stuck in silence because we are afraid we would say something wrong. We have the strength of the horse, the voice of a lion yet we keep allowing ourselves to drown in silence. None of the things you are going through is a waste. Share your experiences, speak your truth and you just might see someone draw strength from it. Someone somewhere is dying to hear your truth so they can draw strength to overcome just as you did and it's okay if you are still trying to figure yours out because it's okay for them to also know that they are not alone.
Our lives are intertwined and I have come to realize this earlier. I have my own experiences and I have come across those who needed it. I have listened to other people's experiences too and I know how it made me feel to know I was never alone. I listened to their process and what they did and tried to do it or even go a bit further.
I have dated someone in my head until they picked another person. I have assumed relationships several times and got burnt. I've been lied to just as I have lied too. I have been deceived many times, cried and hit a low many times before now but they all made sense because that's my story and if I have to share it with others so they would not make the same mistake to save them from a year or months of hurt, I would gladly share it. What I did, that's who I am but what I did isn't who I would become. What are you doing with those experiences?
You are at this point for a time as this where someone will walk up to you or someone around you would be going through what you just overcame so you can help them. We all need one another and you need to distance yourself from anyone who thinks they don't. It's a matter of time before reality catches up with such. We all need to feed off each other's courage to move on in life because life happens...
This post also appeared here and it's my original work on my blog on [Read.Cash](https://read.cash/@Olasquare/dont-waste-that-experience-11d98193).
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.