From a young age, we’re taught that being nice is the golden rule. “Treat others how you want to be treated.” Let me be honest, I have some bones to pick with this whole idea. This article is just my opinion and is for educational purposes only.
There are people who.....honestly just surprise me. These dudes would do anything to please others. Those who take the back seat in every situation, and who think that a little kindness will earn them respect and love. I can sorta see their point of view because I was also at this stage at one point ......but......-Come on!
Let's not kid ourselves. Society is twisted.....or at the very least.....biased. There are people who are the on speed dial of everyone when it comes to "Can you help me do bla bla bla" What do they get in return? A simple thank you at most. What about their wasted time? Do they even like what they're helping with? My guess is no.
People respect you in the beginning. It starts with favors and soon, you can't say no. Then they lose that respect and suddenly, you're a doormat. Deny it as much as you want, but this will eventually happen. I've had my own share of toxic relationships and.......I get where this leads to.
Ever sat down, and thought........about how people love to take advantage of your kindness? No, you're not overthinking. People don't necessarily have to know they're doing it. But nonetheless, the effects are always much the same. Being nice all the time is exhausting! You’re constantly worried about how others perceive you, trying to keep everyone happy, and putting others' needs before your own.
And I know how nice people reason, "I'm a good person" or "It's because I care about them" (spare me the crap) What you're doing is self-neglect. Forgive my harsh tone but that's how it works. You end up feeling drained and unappreciated.
Don't even get me started on this one heck of a lie that nice people believe. "My efforts will be reciprocated" .............I can't laugh enough about this. When was the last time your favor has been returned? If you're not helping a family member --- just know you're screwing yourself up. People don’t owe you anything just because you decided to be the nice guy. You end up feeling resentful and trust me, that’s not a fun place to be.
There is not a single day that being nice to others will be the same as being nice to yourself. It's either one or the other and trust me, the latter always works out. Some people are just looking for what you can offer, not who you are. This doesn't make you selfish, mean, or bitter. As a matter of fact, It makes you feel so much alive.
Because there's no pressure to bend and squeeze yourself into a keyhole to open anyone's door. What about yours? If someone is nice to you, be nice to them. This means you can't be naive. Write a list of all your relationships and cross out negative ones.
Life can be so much happier if you LIVE FOR YOU.
