NO Trust!


What are the worst feelings in life?

Seeing your country and your life being destroyed in front of your eyes or feeling to be dumped by someone you always trusted?

Well i experienced and still experiencing both!


After Beirut explosion, the revolution, the bad economic crisis, the theft of people's money by the banks, the daily life problems (lack of electricity, trash in the streets...), the bad politicians, the almost daily accidents between sects over stupid things which leads to the death of several number of people and injuries of others without the intervention of the army or the internal security forces for some reason 😏, and finally Macron's visit for the second time yesterday which he initiated it by visiting our famous singer of all time Fairuz, she represents the beautiful Lebanon.... 

After all this paradise we are living in, oh I forgot the corona virus, well honestly corona is the least of our concerns. 

Most of us wishing to die of corona because we see it as a salvation. 

And I didnt mention that since the explosion, everyday on tv we see a funeral of a victim of the explosion, or a victim of the militia of a sect or another, we see also the ruined houses, companies, shops..., we see people helping each other while the country is busy getting us another corrupt government to destroy more the country. 


So after all these problems, do you think we are living! 

As I said before in one the articles:

In Lebanon we dont live, we only survive. 

All these crises are so unbearable to the Lebanese people, at least to those who do not follow a leader, and a huge number filed for immigration. 

A lot of others, I am one of those, are wishing to leave the country but we dont have the capacity: no relatives abroad, lack of money because of hyperinflation, no easy visa, no job abroad etc..

The third part which are the followers of the leaders of parties and sects, these people are so blind and illiterate that they will give their lives and their families lives to the leader for some money or a service or because they believe that this leader is protecting their sect for the dangerous others though no one is threatening no one but this is how the leaders brainwash this category. 

This category is the most stupid and dangerous because they are armed, they always fights with the revolutionists and injure them without accountability because they are the leaders' sheeps as they are called. 

So after this paradise we are living in and im sure that none of you can handle the stress and fear of living here and surely every single person will want to leave everything and just go away, so this is what I am planning to do, I am regularly searching for a job abroad, I started with cyprus because it is near, does not cost so much to move, and if something bad happens I can have help or return back.

The problem is that cyprus like many other countries banned giving the visa to us, for some reason, they say because of corona or maybe it is a political thing, anyway finding a job will grant me the visa I guess. 


So during my search for a job, and my struggle to be accepted, I noticed that a lot of countries demanded the EU passport so they don't give other nationalities the chance, so I thought to myself I should have the EU passport to have a decent life, so I turned to a European friend with whom I share a lot of memories and chats for many years and said why don't we get married (10 years ago we wanted to get marry but the circumstances were against us) and you can help me in this way by giving me the passport, it won't cost you anything and you can save me, I asked him because I trusted him as a friend and as a previous lover for many years, and we are still friends or (i thought so), anyway when he read these lines he simply disappeared without saying yes or no or his point of view in this subject. 

I mean if you can help someone without loosing anything, why not! 

I really feel disappointed because I put my trust in the wrong person for so many years, I deserve at least an explanation, we can discuss it as adults people do right? 

I just want to say that sometimes I gladly these things happen so the picture is clear in our eyes. 

From these facts I want to say that I have learned:

1- Not to trust but the people who have proven to be real friends by the actions they took when i needed them. 

2- A person who fail you once, will fail you 1000 times. 

3- Always look out for yourself because no one will, except your close family. 

4- Go where you feel you are safe and there you will find calm and hopefully happiness. 

5- Everywhere can be your home because sometimes you feel to be a stranger in your country. 


It is the instinct of survival i guess that is forcing us to do everything we never thought of doing or asking to have a decent life... 


I will keep walking to reach my goal, even Alone 


Thank you for reading ❤️


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The Lebanese Girl
The Lebanese Girl

I am a curious girl from Lebanon who likes technology and have decided to explore Cryptocurrency ❤️

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