I was nervous

      I have never taken a stimulant ADD medication, so I was a little put off.  But, I tried to look at things objectively. I was missing out on life due to being "out there" so much.  I could get involved in conversation with Mom when I was taking her to the doctor that I would miss my turn.  This is a route I have taken 100 times in the last 5 years. Its not a complicated route, either.  Her GP has THREE turns in the route. Her eye doctor has Four.  I could understand if I had to take a a convoluted route, but these routes should be automatic by now.  Like the many times I drove home drunk as a teenager.  Auto-freakin'-Matic.

       I pulled out my trusty  moto z-4 and opened color note app.  Its an app to take notes. I use it for shopping lists or things I want to research when I get home to the computer. (I still haven't figured out how to open 20 tabs (its an ADD thing)  and easily navigate them on my phone.  I made some notes of how I feel on the new meds. I would like to share them here along with my thoughts.. I emailed from my phone to myself. That allowed me to OPEN ANOTHER TAB and copy the email and then paste into this blog. 

    So here are my notes.  Slightly edited.

           On day one I noticed that although I do not have super concentration, I have a calmness about me. I don't really know how to explain it.
           Mild headache most days. Nothing I cannot deal with.
           Definitely should be taking with food. After about 3 hours stomach started burning a little. A pack of crackers fixed that.
           Music/podcasts do not keep me occupied and help me focus. It's very very easy to get sidetracked.

   My takeaway from the notes.     I am pretty sure that I need a higher dose, but I don't want to go much higher. I really can't explain the calmness. Perhaps it is because I am not as frustrated as I was normally.  I still have to work to remember things. I was taking welbutrin.  It had a calming effect on me, but this is different.  With welbutrin, I didn't mind slowing down  to think about what I needed to remember.  This new med allows me to process things a little faster. I still have to work, but my co-workers don't seem to notice my pauses to think. (if that makes any sense) 

  I think the headaches were my body reacting to a new drug. I only had headaches for the first couple of days.   But I DEFINITELY need to snack a little throughout the day because my stomach will definitely be irritated without food.

  Now, the podcast thing.. I find that really interesting.  When on welbutrin, I could work and still half-assed pay attention to a podcast while running the saw at work.  I had a handrail job of approximately 25 pieces.  All but three had two different angles to be cut on each piece.   In the past, I could listen to TSP, or LFTN or Crypto 101 and still make all my 73degree cuts, then all my 53degree cuts (stacking the couple that were complete at that point on a pallet.), then move on to my 34degree cuts, my 63 degree cuts and finally my 45degree cuts and 90degree cuts. If that sounds confusing, imagine doing that for a 10-hour workday.  In my mind, it makes sense. That means I can cut all the 73 degree cuts, move the saw angle, make the 63 degree cuts, move the angle again to the 53 degree cuts, move again to make the 45degree cuts and finally the 90degree cuts..  Its normally the most efficient way to stay consistent with my angles.  Consistency of angles keeps the welders from bitching too much. lol

I will continue to take notes and probably just send my shrink a link to this post.  Speaking of "squirrel"-ing.  It took me about 4 hours to type this as I kept getting sidetracked.    I hope you found this entertaining, if nothing else.  Til next time.....