Top 10 Rodney Dangerfield Jokes - Cryptic Crypto's Laugh of the Day

By @captaincryptic | Laugh of the Day | 11 Aug 2020

Learning about crypto and earning free crypto is great, but we all need a good laugh every day and that is where Laugh of the Day comes in.  I plan to make a post a day to share jokes, funny videos, and other items sure to bring a smile to your face and hopefully a good laugh.

Today's topic is Rodney Dangerfield jokes.  Rodney made self deprecation humor a form of art.  For someone who joked about not getting any respect, he is truly one of the most respected comedians of all time.   With all due respect I present my Top 10 Rodney Dangerfield jokes.

1. My girlfriend is so ugly, two guys broke into her apartment. She yelled "Rape!" They yelled "NO!"

2. I tell ya, I don't get no respect ... Last week, my wife told me that she was going to cut me down to twice a month. But I thought about it, and I figured that it wasn't too bad. I know a couple of guys that she cut out completely.

3. I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."

4. I went to see my doctor... Doctor Vidi-boom-ba. Yeah...I told him once, "Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me? He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."

5. I came home and caught a guy messing around with my wife.  I asked him "Who said you could fool around with my wife" he said everybody.

6. My wife has to be the worst cook. In my house, we pray after we eat.

7. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.

8. My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.

9. A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

10. I think my wife is cheating on me, the only thing the parrot knows how to say is, "quick out the window".

I hope my list made you laugh, and if not, you should watch this video.  Rodney makes Johnny Carson laugh so hard he has tears running down his face.

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