Articulating this post brought so much emotions to me. I came to realize how motherhood shifted my paradigm the way my father has brought the whole family to be more responsible citizens of the society. Upon writing, my papa's not on his best shape anymore and he hardly recognized me at all moreover he couldn't talk that long. He has to be on oxygen as he has hard time breathing!

• My Greatest Achievement in Life

Being a mother is my greatest achievement in life. I never thought that I would reach a point wherein my lifeline is my son. As I have shared how our first three months together had been mixed emotions and full of anxieties (burping him, giving bathe and most of all breastfeeding him ) all those sleepless nights were part of the milestones not only to my son but mostly to me and to my husband.

I took an extended maternity leave because I can't imagine leaving my baby at an early age of 4 months at the Daycare/Childminding. I was so worried he might not be taken cared properly, a typical mother instinct I guess. Good thing my Department head understood and allowed me for the whole year of my maternity leave (6 months with pay and the rest of the 6 months none).

Such a blessing to become a mother because it changed my perspective in life when it came to family matters. It's like an epiphany for me as I'm healed and reflected on how my relationship with my father had been. I thought I won't be able to forgive him at all. My son taught me real forgiveness and pure love for my father. Our mentor at the truly rich club, Bro. Bo Sanchez said, "Our breaking is our Blessing!'

There was a point when my papa confessed that he regretted having me around. We had a heart to heart talk about it because his dreams back then were shattered the moment he got my mother pregnant so there was a shotgun wedding. I was born in the year where life was really difficult in my country and my father told me he had to work multiple jobs to earn a living to feed me and my mama. He has to make ends meet! They're both in their 20s and my father told me despite their struggles he never attempted to leave my mother because he has to be a man for his own family.

He is a man of honour!

I am teary eyed looking at how strong my papa here and now he could hardly stand on his own.

His illness ripped him off a normal life and only God knows his/our TIME.

This image was taken 2015 during my departure from Davao going back to Seychelles.

Fast forward whenever we visited them in the Philippines for a holiday, my parents would always have that retrospection of how my life back then when I was around my son's age! it's VERY FAR FROM WHAT I HAVE NOW! Likewise there was a moment when my father for the first time in 32 years hugged me when I arrived in Davao after my contract in Doha! his gesture surprised me, saying how relieved they were that I went home safe and sound, alive and kicking. Too bad that chaos in the Middle East brought panic both for us working expats and the locals due to the great threat in the country.

FORGIVENESS and GRATEFULNESS played a major role as to why I am glad being a mother not merely because I was told I am already old (duh age is just a number) but because I won't be able to fully comprehend how it is to become a parent much more I wouldn't have an authenticity understanding when my papa told me how sorry he was for having me. But you see with its turn of events, and with God's grace accompanied with HIS Divine intervention, now we could just joke about it and he is so happy to have seen his grandson for the first-time! 

Compiled our holiday in my country and who would have thought that my father's condition, he hardly remembered this moment where he met Sage for the first time and said he would see us again in two years time.  So heart breaking to know that his condition is preventing him to carry my baby just like how he did when we were there with them. Only God can heal him.

Courtesy from Hive

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