Billionaire and philanthropist Elon Musk has been actively involved in peace negotiations in Ukraine. After making a few suggestions on Twitter about how the whole situation should be resolved, he didn't hesitate to head straight to Moscow to see Putin to end this senseless war once and for all.

“In the business world, I have achieved everything a person can achieve. Now I'm needed elsewhere. The time has come for me to give something back to society. Peace is needed in the world and I will achieve it. Being the most important and interesting person in the world, it is my duty to bring peace to the world and thus improve the lives of all people on planet Earth," explained Musk at a press conference before his departure for Moscow.

"When I set my mind to something, I achieve it. Peace will be almost a certainty after my intervention. I have already informed President Putin that I will be attending the meeting. I promise a lot from it, but I believe that I will achieve even more than a lot. I can achieve anything. I'm Elon Musk, dammit,” Musk thundered into the microphone.

Subsequently, as there was still some time left, he presented at the press conference a new folding mirror for the new generation Tesla car, which did not fold during the presentation, but fell off the car. Musk laughed at that, announced that that's what the mirror was supposed to do, and then left.

From the USA, Musk immediately flew to Warsaw on his private plane, where in the presence of journalists he ceremoniously got into a Tesla Model S car and set off on his way to Moscow to the sounds of the American national anthem and fireworks.

Thirty kilometers from Warsaw, however, Musk ran out of battery in his Tesla, so he had to stop and deal with the situation.

“They don't have a charging station in this shithole in this third world country?” raged Elon Musk, who ran out of battery in his car on a second-class road between two villages next to a cornfield.

"Mr. Musk was kicking the car and raging. He then walked two kilometers to the nearest village and demanded a charging station. When the locals told him the nearest station was in Warsaw, Mr. Musk threw rocks at the locals and shouted that they were backward monkeys and to go back to the trees. When he calmed down, he went from house to house to see if anyone had an extension cord. Unfortunately, no one had such a long one," testified a random witness.

Apparently, when Musk found out he couldn't charge his car on the spot, he decided to have his Tesla towed back to Warsaw.

"I can confirm that. Mr. Musk was running around our village cursing everyone for being backward bastards. Then he looked for a tow truck. I offered to tow him to Warsaw by tractor. He cursed at my forks and angrily kicked the two chickens I had in the backyard," claims a local man.

According to witnesses, Musk then tried to call a helicopter, but his phone failed to connect to Skylink. That should have pissed him off even more.

“I give a shit about this. People want to help, they want to establish peace, but everywhere it's just a peasant here. Europe is lost. It's not worth saving here," Musk was said to have shouted, before walking to the nearest train stop. He should have been cursing the whole way.

When he got back to Warsaw by train, he got back on his private plane and flew home, saying that peace was being delayed because he said he didn't have the nerve for it.

This is a fake news about things which didn't happen, but they could, as unbelievable as they sound.

Any coincidence of names of persons or names of places is purely coincidental and has no relation to the real world.

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