Speaking like a memestocker makes you sound like a child! (Kooopa I'm looking at you)

By Codeinmy | Digital Mind Fortress | 19 Jun 2021

Most people probably don't recognize how sarcastic I am.  I do almost everything ironically.

Example: in 2015 I went on a road trip with my schoolmates and decided to start posting to instagram to mock the many "gram-ers" we encountered.  Six years later I 'gram every week about my daily adventures. It all looks pretty serious, but to me it is still just a gag, as evidenced by the numerous pictures of my dog passed out on the rug.

One of my recent favourite activities related to stock trading (which I take very seriously) is the stonk craze.  I love how GME broke Melvin Capital Management with their grassroots financial middle finger aimed firmly at big wallstreet hedge fund investors.  In the process r/wallstreetbets and others created/spread a new lingo. It reeks of pubescent video gamers, hailing back to an age of leetspeak but with a strong aftertaste of poop emoji, eggplant and peaches. 

For those uninitiated I will outline a few common terms below:

  • Stonks - stocks
  • Ape - member of the reddit investing community (see this heartwarming article on why)
  • Moon/rocketship - The top of the stock run, theoretically infinity
  • Diamond hand - Refusing to sell
  • Paper hand - when you're scared so you sell. Opposite of diamond hands
  • Hodl - hold (purposely misspelled)
  • DD - due diligence, a.k.a. research
  • Tendies - Earnings
  • Bagholder - When you diamond hand a stock and the price tumbles
  • Bagger (e.g. 10-bagger) - how many times multiple the stock value has increased


There are many more terms you will learn if you follow r/wallstreetbets, r/baystreetbets, r/pennystocks, and others. I begrudgingly admit that they are both fun and useful.  My coworkers and I can quickly make statements about our latest stock picks using phrases like "fueling up for the moon" or "bagholding with the apes". It also keeps the conversations within our "intelligent user" circle in a busy workplace. Thus, I am not here to hate on the lingo or dissuade others from its use.

My only warning is this: these do not sound like adult conversations.  This type of language will not gain you clout in a serious financial or work environment. 

I was recently surprised to read some strong stonkspeak on the offical launch page for the new cryptoproject KOOOPA. I should not be surprised that a videogame-centric token named after a Super Mario Bros. character uses language some would consider childish. The whole project sounds childish. It is too bad, because the premise is quite good.

Let me outline briefly:

Imagine a marketplace where game studios and individual designers put together their pitch with some preliminary graphics, gameplay style, etc.  Players who are interested in the game invest in it by dropping Kooopa's token ($KOO) on the game, which helps the designers bring it to market.  Then when it starts turning a profit they get a portion based on their stake. They're crowdfunding the game they believe is as an investment. As a concept I love it! They're also offering airdrops, which will help my collection.

So my concerns are more broadly about the crypto market. While ETH and BTC are busy putting on their big boy pants to become internationally recognized currencies, some experimental altcoins are just goofing around to see how much money they can drum up from the nice Robinhood guys and gals. Maybe speaking in emojis makes them more relatable or gives them an edge in a world of more than 5000 altcoins fighting for a niche. Or maybe they're just a bunch of tweens playing us for fools.  Time will tell.

As always, if you disagree I would be pleased to hear about it. Leave notes in the comments below or just come back for more verbal diarrheas. 


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