ALEXA! PRESEARCH WHO IS THIS "RAYNE 'THE JOCK' DWONSON" GUY?

ALEXA! PRESEARCH WHO IS THIS "RAYNE 'THE JOCK' DWONSON" GUY?

By JalapenioJoy | Crypto Pickle Tickle | 26 Mar 2021


In a cybernetic dimension an elderly man sits in his velvet egg couch. Tesla cables hang from the roof and stick to his skull. Neurons stay charged and sleep becomes a background action, the problem of FOMO is solved, you never have to stop scrolling again! The only screens he needs are the lenses protecting his eyeballs; the timed Roomba Vacuum is great and all, but years of dead skin tends to just... float in the air.

The packet of vegan-cheesy, gluten-free, avocado-flavored Doritos rustle around his eager fingers. He has a flash memory... a memory from his distant youth... a giant man with a shiny bald head and a strong charisma that somehow comes from his eyebrows.

ALEXA! WHO IS THIS "RAYNE 'THE JOCK' DWONSON" GUY?

 

In order to help our cybernetic elder jog his memory let's use multiple search engines to bring out the best results. "RAYNE 'THE JOCK' DWONSON" Unfortunately on every engine lead to very misleading and... somehow inappropriate results. It's unlikely that these things are what our elder needs because of our brief description of bald head and charismatic eyebrows. In order to help let's try to reshape what his memory got wrong. Dwayne sounds right... why would there be a 'the' in someone's name? So that leaves... Let's try this: Dwayne Rock Sonjon. That sounds okay, but I just don't know who it could be...

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Surprisingly, my brain was automatically shocked that I was receiving an ad plastered to my face that I'm not remotely interested in. That sounds weird, right? But I'm sure you'll understand exactly what I'm talking about when I say - ever get that strange feeling when you receive an ad relevant to a recent conversation - or even thought? It's probably happened - whether that's from an obvious information-mining app like Messenger, or simply a vocal conversation with someone in the same room as the device... You may not acknowledge it that much, but that is you feeling violated and it is completely justified.

NEVERTHELESS - IT FELT STRANGE. I was a little bit pissed off, like I was privileged enough to think my three active adblockers should have dealt with that for me and that I shouldn't have to look at it. This is because at first I didn't realize that advertisements come from a user paying the native token PRE. It dawned on me a little clearer that decentralization, and crypto in general, is a two-way street. If I want to earn the token for doing a simple every day task, and I want it to be worth something, I should support the living hell out of Helen and her music lessons. YOU GO HELEN! There's a point here - and it's to remember that in this space we are allowed to be skeptical, but we don't need to stick it to the man here. We are the man here. That sounded better in my head... It wasn't quite as Braveheart as I hoped. I should also probably stop writing this sentence in bold, because it draws attention to it - anyway... who's this Jayne The Dock Ronson Guy?

Unfortunately Presearch left us at a dead end. It makes me HANKER for the "Did You Mean...?" prompts that various search engines offer, but Presearch is still in its adolescence, and once governance begins - I'll put that vote where my mouth is instead of my keyboard-warrior-blogs. That being said, Google really wasn't that far ahead in terms of results.

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THAT MUST BE HIM!

The actual search results are spot on, but Google takes the cake not only because of the "did you mean?" prompt but the clear row of images along the bottom. This is an entire CLICK away on Presearch - do you know how much effort that is for us Doomers - Millenials - Gen Zs - Gen Ps - Gen ders - Whatever-we-ares? It's like - yeah - like a lot - like - seriously.

Our cybernetic elder's memory is refreshed by such a perfect smile and he swiftly swipes back to browsing Tik-Tok memes. The end.

But the real end is for you guys, the Publish0x audience here. Memes and simple comparisons aside, you are on publish0x for a reason, you believe in Crypto and DeFi - and you like free stuff - especially free stuff from solid projects that have a strong idea and a stronger foundation. If you haven't made the switch yet, why not? Google, DuckDuckGo and Bing will still be only one tab away, don't worry, you don't have to boycott them, I know it's in fashion, but really, you don't.

There will never be one search engine, nor will there only be one crypto, or one type of chicken restaurant. It's our job as users and consumers to spend our energy and support in the right projects.

But - what are the right projects? It's a good question to ask and asking is a fantastic habit to get into. For now, how about we just start with... 

Ones that don't spy on us and sell off our information like we're drug-injected monkeys in a zoo.

Don't let the feeling of vulnerability and violation be part of your everyday routine.

 

Thank you for reading my #SearchWithPresearch entry. It's not the most serious submission, but one that I hope some of you had fun with.

Happy browsing, I hope all your pickles get tickled, if not by this post then by the other wonderful content on Publish0x!!

JalapenioJoy

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JalapenioJoy
JalapenioJoy

Crypto fan and writer of blogs, journals, articles and fiction prose!


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