You make mistakes. Shit happens. The environment changes.

MANGA 

The Heavenly Way teaches harmony as perfect balance, a strong symmetry enforced by order, restraint and self-discipline.

The Demonic Way whispers a different truth.
Harmony is the coexistence between balance and imbalance.

Few can avoid deviation throughout their lives. Most can’t. Finding equilibrium doesn’t mean denying your nature. It means accepting it, and learning how to balance your moments of reasoning and your moments of instinct. Harmony is a dance between internal order and chaos.

REALITY

Things happened, I lost my cool. In real life and in gambling. 

Damage is done. Rinse and retry. The goals are the same.

Gambling

My stack got burned, unexpectedly. I tried to recover too fast and erased all my coins betting. I saved just the stacked BTCs. 

Financially? Almost nothing. Mentally ? Weak. Afterwards ?  Stupid.

Regret ? Yes. Desperation ? No.

I want Betfury to be productive. BetFury doesn’t need emotions. It needs discipline. I moved my funds (1.3$ sigh) from CoinpayU and retuned to my low-bet martingale. Others would have handled the loss better. I didn’t. It happened, it's in the past, I'll try to avoid repeating it next time. 

The real reason

I wasn't ok.

I made life harder for someone that's really dear to me. I didn't want to. She offered me an hand, I tried to get the whole harm. Life feels heavier now. 

The doubt haunts me. Did she lie first, or was it all my fault? I’ll probably never know.

Regret ? Yes. Desperation ? No. 

The Demonic Way doesn’t protect you. It gives you hubris. It gives you falls. 

I’ll work to be better, and hope she’ll accept me again.
One week of sugar and beer is enough.

Now it’s time to find equilibrium, knowing I can't be always balanced. Next time  I'll try to regain composure before the damage is too great.

With Love and feigned Serenity,

Lazy 

(I'll put Bitcoin as a tag