“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
— E.E. Cummings

For this blog post I want to talk to the teenagers and young adults who might be within my circle of influence. Over the past few years I've noticed a trend that continues to this day (esp with COVID and the current economic environment) of children who remain in their parents home beyond high school and college.

Now I will be the first to say I don't have children and I haven't experienced raising my own first hand. That said, the information I want to encourage you all with, I don't believe I need to have first hand experience at raising children to provide. 

As E. E. Cummings have said, growing up takes courage. When I was 18 years old I was determined to fly the nest. Since I had been employed and working for the prior 3 years, I had some resources to make it happen. Being fully transparent, my mother and I didn't have the best relationship at that time and I wanted to be my own person. So, I went apartment hunting and found a studio apartment and off I went. 6 months was enough time to demonstrate that I didn't have the skills required to live on my own and I retreated back to her house. It would be 2 years before the Navy snatched me up and gave me a new home. 

While I occupied residency in my mom's house for those two years, I made every attempt to live by the guidelines she stipulated. Being that I worked 7 days a week, I wasn't really at home all that much so it really wasn't that much of an issue.

However, had I not enlisted in the Navy, I'd like to think that I would have matured financially to the point where I could once again fly the coop and especially being 20 going on 21, I couldn't have envisioned wanting to live with my mom. 

Today, I hear parents debating and arguing with their kids who are beyond high school age and some beyond college age about how they behave in the home. Recently a parent told me that their child screamed at them that they were grown and should be able to do what they want to do. 

Kids, listen up, if you are beyond the age of 18 and you are living in your parents home (I will repeat YOUR PARENTS home) you have zero grounds to call any shots. The room you are in isn't YOUR room, it's a room in YOUR PARENTS home. If you feel that you are all grown up, then I would encourage you to find employment, save, invest, and find your own home. This way if you desire to do the things you want to do, there is no one to tell you no. But as long as you live in your parents home, you should live by the guidelines your parents have put in place for you to maintain peace. 

I know adulting can be scary but you must have the COURAGE to step out in the bold wild yonder and do your own thang, pay your own bills, feed yourselves, and stop arguing with your parents about what you do, when you do, how you do , and with whom you do it. 

Parents, does that sounds right? I know you care for your children and I know some never want their kids to grow up. However, when their lifestyle impede on your peace, I believe you should not adjust to them, but they should adjust to you. After all you are paying all the bills right? Folks, debating and arguing with grown people isn't wise.