Sushi is a Japanese contribution to World Culture with a reputation for excellence. The excitment of Sushi stems from the Rice provided by Ō-Inari. Ō-Inari is the Japanese kami of foxes, fertility, rice, tea and sake, of agriculture, industry, general prosperity. and worldly success. One of the principal kami of Shinto, Ō-Inari stepped in to become protector of the rice crop when Ō-Getsu was killed by the Moon god Tsuki-yomi. Deicide aside, Ō-Inari is an incredibly popular kami, with one third of the shrines in Japan dedicated to them. If you are going to make Sushi - especially fusion Sushi - then you need to ensure you are on the correct side of Ō-Inari.

Which is why the best fusion sushi is made from Bradán Feasa: the Salmon of Knowledge. Japanese made sushi is never really mass produced. The careful examination of the fish, to identify potential parasites is not something that can be delegated to some machine or other. No matter the sophistication of a machine learning algorithm, there is little substitute for a genuine, expert, Sushi Chef. Bradán Feasa: the Salmon of Knowledge is generally found in the Celtic Atlantic Fringe of Europe.

Bradán Feasa is generally attributed to Fintan mac Bóchra - Fionntán the Wise - being transformed into a Salmon. As with Minotaurs and other Creatures, there is always a debate about the cannibalistic aspect of the undertaking. This worry is usually dismissed by ensuring the sushi is made with the most distractingly, high quality rice. The Salmon of Knowledge is associated, across the Celtic Fringe, with Wise Men. So, just like the pin bones of many fish, there will always be a risk.

The Salmon of Knowledge is generally caught in flowing water by waiting, sometimes for as many as a full month from Moon to Moon. It is, therefore, a rare treat rather than a midweek indulgence. The Salmon is caught by the method of tickling. This involves standing in running waver with your hands still, open palmed, waiting for the Salmon to wander past. At the moment the Salmon passed between your hands, you must flip the fish to the shore and then scramble landward to kill the fish without laying an injury upon it. The exact method is a secret passed down the generations and involves the ministrations of a Salmon Priest. A thick lump of wood that is a relic of the true cross or some such. With it the Salmon of Knowledge can be despatched without an injury. Although, to the naked eye, the fish head looks bashed in.

Carefully clean your work area. Even with a Salmon of Knowledge there is a risk of contracting disease and expiring on the spot so hygiene is of utmost importance. Begin with wiping the work surfaces clean and scalding with boiled water. If in doubt, the best thing to do is burn the entire building to the ground and begin again. 

2 cups Japanese sushi rice
6 tablespoons rice wine vinegar
6 sheets nori
1 avocado
1 cucumber
8 ounces salmon of knowledge, cured.
2 tablespoons wasabi paste

Catch your Salmon of Knowledge.

Curing your Salmon of Knowledge requires a simple cure. Do not be tempted to use alcohol in the curing process. If you are inclined to bring alcohol to the kitchen, apply it to the Sous Chef not the ingredients. Curing a salmon takes a decent seventy two hours in a fridge, pressed between marble blocks after salting, peppering and, perhaps, covering in dill. This part of the recipe is crucial to get right: without the right cure, the Salmon of Knowledge is not going to be the exciting dish you hope. Always, always, always check that your curing method is appropriate.

Soak rice for four hours. Drain rice and cook, in a rice cooker, until tender, with two cups of water. The rice should be slightly dry.

While the rice soaks, slice the avocado and cucumber, removing seeds and cutting into strips.

Immediately the rice is cooked: mix six tablespoons of rice vinegar into the hot rice. Spread the rice onto a clean plate until completely cool.

Place one sheet of seaweed on bamboo mat. Press a thin layer of cool rice on the seaweed. Leave at least one half inch uncovered at the top and bottom edges of the seaweed. This enables easier sealing later. Dot wasabi on the rice.

Arrange the cucumber, avocado and smoked salmon onto the rice. Positioned one inch from the bottom margin of the seaweed.

Slightly wet the top edge of the seaweed. Roll from bottom to the top edge with the help of the bamboo mat tightly.

Cut roll into eight equal pieces and serve.

Repeat for other rolls.

It is always important to never suck your thumb while preparing Salmon of Knowledge. That simply turns a rare and exquisite dish into ordinary Salmon Sushi but renders the Chef into the Wisest person in the building. Should this happen, start again.

Servings this Recipe: 6
Calories: 291 % Daily Value * protein: 11.1g 22 % carbohydrates: 45.1g 15 % dietary fiber: 3.8g 15 % sugars: 0.2g fat: 6.9g 11 % saturated fat: 1.1g 6 % cholesterol: 8.7mg 3 % vitamin a iu: 252.1IU 5 % niacin equivalents: 6.5mg 50 % vitamin b6: 0.3mg 19 % vitamin c: 5.4mg 9 % folate: 115.3mcg 29 % calcium: 16.1mg 2 % iron: 2.6mg 14 % magnesium: 31.2mg 11 % potassium: 322.6mg 9 % sodium: 404.7mg 16 %
mercury: 0% thiamin: 0.3mg 27 % calories from fat: 61.7

*Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs. **Nutrient information is not available for all ingredients. Amount is based on available nutrient data. (-)Information is not currently available for this nutrient.

If you are following a medically restrictive diet, please consult your Physick before preparing this recipe for personal consumption. Do not permit your food taster to consume any of the dish for reasons of knowledge.