I am a donkey. A donkey, riding a walrus. A few other things that I have absolutely no clue about. Because this story is the only thing that I have ever written. Not once but twice. I wrote it out on paper for the first time when I was eight because I thought it was cool and that’s when I drew the walrus as well. The second time I tried was much more difficult and far more terrifying. That was because I did not have paper. No paper, no notebook, no pencil.
What I did have was is a pen. I was eight again and I was in class. The teacher was not speaking so I began to doodle. I hadn’t realized it at first but as I was drawing a tree I found myself drawing a walrus. But, I didn’t draw a walrus; I drew a walrus riding a donkey. My hands trembled a little bit and my heart was pumping harder and faster than I could tell for sure.
“Henry,” the teacher said, holding my drawings close to her face and squinting at them as if she did not think I would notice. “What have you got there?”
“Drawings.” I said.
The class snickered and the teacher looked at my classmates with a very concerned expression of anger that would become permanent had I not thought about distracting her.
“Of what, Henry?” She said, as if the answer did not seem obvious enough for her.
“Trees.” I said. “And a walrus.”
The children snickered, just as they did the time before. I tried to say something but I could not so I just tried to absorb the teacher’s gaze, which was menacing in this moment.
My hands remained weak and shaking as I tried to caress the soft cotton of the white paper, but soon after the drawing of the walrus came a drawing of the donkey and after the Donkey came me with the walrus.
Author Notes: Well… that was a thing to behold. I literally gave the AI two short sentences and it churned this out. I did snicker a bit when writing the two short sentences as I wondered what madness GPT-3 could even make for a “story”.