Now that I've had a a few more months under my belt with teaching university (and some secondary school) music students, I've come to realise that things that I see in some (many) colleagues in Classical music perhaps have their seeds much further along in our training... and all of this has roots in some pretty questionable directions that the stream of Classical Music took many many generations ago.
Well... the big problem is that, as performers, we tend to be terrified of judgement... from audiences, but most critically, I think that many of us tend to fear judgement from peers, colleagues, and "leaders". Of course, we are just human... so a good chunk of this is just natural... we want to fit in, and be respected, and be valued. So, when we put ourselves on show (a performance), we fear to put too much of ourselves into it... just in case. It is a self-preservation thing... you put too much of your naked interpretive self on display, and you are going to invite criticism (and admiration...). Many of us will recoil away from that judgement, and play in a way that will protect ourselves.
Now, this is completely different to the "stage fright"... fight or flight response. This is not a case of nerves and dealing with that, but something that is more about placing your entire self on display.
Some musicians will manage to overcome this fear... and they are going to be either loved or reviled. But they will have made a statement about their art and performance. Others will choose the common road, and stick close to convention and not stick their heads up. The incentives are there for them to do that... don't lose your job, do the minimum required and don't fuck things up... these are definitely admirable goals as well, but when the balance of priorities become don't take risks and offend NO-ONE... then, one has to wonder what is the purpose of it all?
So, when I've been teaching and tutoring music performance at the tertiary and secondary level (I've even started to have some colleagues ask for me to listen to them... weird...), I find that their training has been so highly focused on the technical aspects and following a "master's" interpretation that they are often unwilling or unable to make a coherent musical interpretation for themselves, let alone have the bravery to put it out on display. Again, a little disclaimer... not all teachers do this, but after seeing quite a few teachers teach... I'm starting to think that many teachers do prioritise differently to me.
Sure, playing in tune and playing time and all of that technical stuff is really quite important... but in the end, they are the tools of the trade... and not the actual artwork. After all, you would go to see a master artwork (painting...), but you don't really CARE about the brushes and the paints that were used. If you were a fellow painter, then you might be interested in that sort of thing, but you wouldn't mistake those materials and painting techniques for the actual painting!
Now, in music... we have examinations from a young age, recitals at conservatories, through to the auditions that will determine if a young professional will win a job or not in a symphonic orchestra. All of these are highly competitive (especially at the professional end...)... and all of them prioritise a narrow way of playing that hinges on technical perfection, and uniformity of interpretation. All of which sounds like creative hell to me...
Now, I've also heard people say that conservatories are the death of music... which is sort of true, but it doesn't mean that they are completely useless. Nowhere else will you get such intensive training in music, but then at some point, you have to let that all go... and develop as a musician in your own right. Sadly, not all fledgling musicians will manage that last step... and I think that we don't always make them aware of that either. Also, I'm not advocating that missing out on conservatory training MAKES you a better musician, sure there are some that will manage that... but it is as logically false as the idea that dropping out of school/university will make you successful just because one random person that did take that path got a lucky roll of the dice!
Now, I think that the seeds for "perfection" over "entertainment" were sown a very long time ago... musicians stopped being the composers of their own music, we stopped improvising, and our highest ideal was to be "faithful to the composer/music". All of which I think is a load of crap. How do you know if you are faithful to the composer/music? Unless you have a direct line to the dead person.... well, you are just guessing on limited information/direction, and it would be high arrogance to presume that you are guessing right! Meanwhile, at the other end of the spectrum... are those modern composers that like to notate and hyper-micro-manage the musicians... well, they have lost sight of what music is, which is a constantly evolving art form that is ephemeral and constantly being reinterpreted and reborn.
... which leads me to my other gripe. Recording, this was the nail in the coffin. We "freeze" a performance in a single interpretation that is supposed to be the "ideal". Firstly, recordings are unnatural abominations of edits and cuts.... secondly, music was NEVER meant to be frozen. But this freezing means that we make our students try to achieve something that just ISN'T possible... that level of perfection is the very definition of being the enemy of good. It balances the priorities to "getting things right" instead of "entertaining".... and it produces a one-sided conversation between the musician and the now non-existent "audience" that is replaced at the the end with a one-sided conversation between the audience and the non-existent "musician".
All of this thinking was kicked off by a tertiary student asking me to listen to some things that they were working on for a symphony orchestra audition... interestingly enough, I play on occasion with that orchestra, and as fate would have it... I'm on the audition panel! Not that they knew that though... It led me to thinking about WHAT it is that I prize in colleagues... flexibility, responsiveness, and daring... of course, the technical stuff as well, but that is just a basic given... and NOT the end point, just the beginning. But if I had to choose, I would prioritise the former over the latter.
Meanwhile, a colleague had also played for me in the same week... and I was curious about how they had got themselves into such a bind about "getting things right" that everything was difficult and stilted, and they stopped enjoying the act of playing!
... many things to think about. I seem to have made an impression on the people that I have had contact with... with varying degrees of success. It is an easy thing to say... that you shouldn't fear judgement, and that your performance is BETTER if you just play with heart instead of treading the tightrope walk of trying to conform to someone else's expectations. Some of us do manage to have a defining moment where that particular lightbulb clicked...
But how to approach this in future students... I currently have all my students do a little improvisation and exploration of their sound and instruments for each lesson. I think that is a start... the recovery of the ability to just play without fear and judgement, and just owning the meander of notes that comes out... because, nothing is wrong... it is just your own doodle.
... that said, some resist quite heavily!
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